News & Politics

CDC Tells Fertile Women: You Can't Handle Both Booze and Sex

The nanny state’s Center for Disease Control has a new Vital Signs Report out, telling all fertile females to knock it off with the booze and sex.

Here’s Anne Schuchat, principal deputy director of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, informing American women that they just can’t handle adult responsibilities:

Alcohol can permanently harm a developing baby before a woman knows she is pregnant. … About half of all pregnancies in the United States are unplanned, and even if planned, most women won’t know they are pregnant for the first month or so, when they might still be drinking. … The risk is real.

Why take the chance?

The way the CDC sees it, there are 3.3 million women aged 15-44 that are risking exposing their fetus to their boozy ways, and these women simply aren’t capable of both responsible drinking and responsible sex, so they should go cold-turkey:

Even when women are actively trying to get pregnant, three in four continue drinking after they stop using birth control, according to the CDC report.

The government wants to remind you that alcohol “can cause lasting physical, behavioral and intellectual disabilities that can last for a child’s lifetime.” Plus, your boozy, slutty ways cost the taxpayer $5.5 billion, according to the report.

It further advises health care professionals:

[Doctors] should routinely screen women regarding their alcohol use, both before and during pregnancy, and should provide support for women to stop use of alcohol when planning a pregnancy or when becoming pregnant.

Wanda Filer, president of the American Academy of Family Physicians, says:

Hopefully, this is the sort of report that will make people stop and think.

The American Beverage Institute? It did not agree with the CDC assessment. Said Sarah Longwell, the group’s managing director:

The CDC’s view on alcohol is incredibly puritanical. The more prohibitionist the agency’s stance, the less seriously the public will take its message.