News & Politics

Prostitutes, Socialists, And Eco-Monsters: What's Going on in Alabama?

(AP Photo/David Goldman)

A hooker, a socialist, and an eco-Nazi walk into Alabama.

Seriously. The clean air group GASP and the Party For Socialism and Liberation have buddied up and are appearing at rally for “sex workers” in Birmingham, Ala., though details are scarce.

The Global Network of Sex Work Projects states that this is an annual event, and their 3 goals in life are:

  • Acceptance of sex work as work.
  • Opposition to all forms of criminalization and other legal oppression of sex work (including sex workers, clients, third parties*, families, partners, and friends).
  • Supporting self-organization and self-determination of sex workers

They claim to have affiliates in  five regions: AfricaAsia and the PacificEuropeLatin America, and North America and the Caribbean.

The Party of Socialism and Liberation seems to barely have the time to sand up for the methhead prostitutes of Alabama, what with what seems to be a chaotic schedule of supporting Palestine, ending the sanctions against Cuba, and raising their angry white fists for Black Lives Matter. Their latest Facebook post states, “Without the economic, political, military and diplomatic backing of U.S. imperialism, the state of Israel would not last long.”  Imperialism? I kind of agree with Colin Powell when he said,

And when all those conflicts were over, what did we do?  Did we stay and conquer? Did we say, “Okay, we defeated Germany. Now Germany belongs to us? We defeated Japan, so Japan belongs to us”? No. What did we do? We built them up. We gave them democratic systems which they have embraced totally to their soul. And did we ask for any land? No, the only land we ever asked for was enough land to bury our dead. And that is the kind of nation we are.” (October, 1980)

But hey, that’s just me, I’m sure the socialist, clean air hooker people know better.

And just like a Scooby-Doo cartoon, the local hick sheriff is causing chaos and trying to chase the clean air-lovin’ hookers out of Birmingham. This pro-prosty event comes after the evil sheriff reportedly arrested more than a dozen people in a reverse prostitution ring in Shelby County. Regarding the arrests, Sheriff’s Major Clay Hammac stated, “The purpose of these operations is to aggressively pursue patrons of the sex-trafficking industry, which is directly connected to human trafficking. Furthermore, law enforcement wishes to demonstrate a zero-tolerance for criminal solicitation and attack the demand for these type enterprises.” Now read that again in the voice of Sheriff Buford T. Justice.