Men, We Have to Talk About Scaring Women in Parking Lots: Don't

And for thy maintenance; commits his body
To painful labor both by sea and land,
To watch the night in storms, the day in cold,
Whilst thou li’st warm at home, secure and safe;

I will never forget the first time I saw Mr. Fox, biceps bulging, lift a full cooler into a truck like he was flinging a backpack. I think it was the moment I fell in love. (Single guys, hit the gym and lift. Women value strength over most other physical qualities. It literally makes our knees buckle to watch men lift stuff. I don’t know why; it just does. Bulk up.) Yesterday, my brother-in-law caught a huge tree branch in one hand while standing on a ladder. My sister was beside herself with incredulous praise and admiration. It was hilarious. Women are awestruck by you guys.

This roughneck video below is literally the hottest thing I’ve ever seen in my life. Men doing men things — it’s beautiful. It’s almost like watching aliens; it’s something on another level that makes me feel awestruck by what men can do. Thank you Jesus for men and muscles!

I am not one of those womyn who takes every opportunity to belittle and tear down men. On the contrary, I believe good, decent, hard-working men should be praised and provided with any kind of sandwiches they like by pretty women who love them (or beef stew, if you’re my son who begs for it like it’s his last meal). So if you’re the kind of man who commits his body to painful labor for the good of his family and society, then you have my undying affection and thanks. I thank God on my knees for you. I know you’re what’s standing between me and the violence of nature.

But good men aren’t the only type of man in this world. Some men are manipulative and scary and spend their lives preying on the weak. I had an encounter with one of those men recently.

I was traveling with my children to get to my sister’s house for my niece’s Sweet 16 birthday party. It’s not a long trip but it does require a few bathroom stops. Mr. Fox had to stay home due to work obligations. When I’m traveling alone, my head is always on a swivel; when my children are in tow, I’m on constant high alert.

I was letting my oldest get some driving practice in, and it was time for me to take over again because we were about to get on a busy expressway. So, I had her pull into a gas station. The neighborhood was mostly industrial and definitely worn down, but the station was busy. It seemed safe enough.

The moment I stepped out of the car and began unloading the kids for a bathroom break, a disheveled man started toward me, quickly and with purpose. Our eyes made contact, and my instincts instantly alerted me to potential danger.

I’m from Chicago, raised by a Chicagoan. I knew what was coming and I knew what to do. This was the grift where drug addicts hang out at a gas station and tell the same story all day long about some hardship: my car broke down, I ran out of gas, my baby is hungry, etc. and then they ask you for money. The man got as far as “My car just bro—” before I put my hand out in front of me and shouted, “NO!” in the voice I use to scold my German Shepherd, Archie Ruckus. The grifter stopped and then started toward me again, continuing his con for money. I continued to shout, “DON’T COME ANY CLOSER. LEAVE ME ALONE.” He stopped about 10 feet from me and began to berate me about being rude. I ignored him and took my children into the gas station…which did not have a bathroom (of course).

Yep. The loud, authoritative tone is important. It's the "fuck around and find out" tone I use with this guy. Works. pic.twitter.com/mWPVmPTy9d

— Megan Fox (@MeganFoxWriter) July 31, 2022

We returned to the car. The man was still loitering near it (although not looking me in the eyes this time), muttering about “unchristian” something or other, tapping into Sunday school lessons and attempting to manipulate my natural womanly desire to be seen as kind and generous. I’m sure it’s an effective tactic when used on women who didn’t learn about predators on the streets of a big city from a wise father.

I looked past him where he stood near the driver’s side door — and noticed three more men behind him, lurking under the bushes beside the car like a pack of jackals. I hadn’t seen them from the passenger’s seat when we arrived and my daughter parked there.

I ordered my children to get in the car then I proceeded to walk directly at the man hanging out by my side of the vehicle. I walked without hesitation or visible fear, claiming my car and my space. He backed off and returned to his office under the bushes, muttering something nasty as I walked by but still refusing to meet my gaze. The other men in the shrubbery just sat there staring, waiting to see if I’d crack. I believe the energy I was giving off came through loud and clear as I stared back — don’t f*ck with me or my kids. One of the jackals broke eye contact with me and looked down. I got into my car and locked the doors.

I drove away without any more problems and found a safer place to stop for a bathroom break further up the road. I posted about this experience on Twitter and was surprised at how many men with some kind of “MAGA” in their bios berated me as a “man-hater” for my opinion that men should never approach women they don’t know in parking lots for any reason. “Pure feminism and hatred for men right here,” wrote a man who has “God, country, family” in his bio. Frankly, I feel sorry for the women in his family.

Good men should know that women fear all strange men because we don’t know which ones mean us harm and which ones don’t. It’s better for men to err on the side of caution and give women who are alone space and distance. It’s not man-hating feminism to be on high alert for predators. Would you want your daughters and wives accosted by drugged-up men looking for an easy mark?

Pure feminism and hatred for men right here

— Peter Lagrande (@LagrandePeter) July 31, 2022

Having a healthy fear of potential male predators is not feminism. It’s what I was taught by Brazilian Jiu Jitsu masters. I did exactly as I was taught to do in a situation where I felt threatened.

The first thing Jiu Jitsu masters teach you is to forget your manners. Women are often taught to be polite — to their detriment. My aunt was in an elevator once and a man got on who made her feel scared. Her inner voice told her to get off the elevator but she silenced that voice, not wanting to hurt his feelings. As soon as the doors shut, that man attacked her. She was able to escape before she was seriously injured or killed, but it’s a lesson no one wants to learn the hard way. Don’t ignore that voice — your instinct — that tells you you’re in danger. Who cares if you’re wrong? You will be alive.

Some of you don't know that all women live in fear of being attacked by men and it shows. It's not "feminist" it's our reality. And it's one more reason why women deserve our spaces free from men. Because you'll never get it. https://t.co/1x87wuXOsk

— Megan Fox (@MeganFoxWriter) July 31, 2022

Any man shaming a woman for protecting her children or her person is not a man at all but a spoiled child who doesn’t understand the world and how it works. Caught up in his own disappointment of being rejected by women or upset by anti-male sentiment, he doesn’t try to see the world from a female perspective. Women know that half the adult population can kill us easily with their bare hands in minutes, sometimes with a single punch.

This is why the feminist message of the sexes being equal is so damaging. We will never equal men in strength and power. Women will always be weaker and at risk of being seriously harmed by bad men. This is why we need female-only spaces where men are not allowed, because some of them will use a lack of boundaries to prey on us. Men are also at risk from violent men, of course, but they have a better shot at fighting off an attacker. Women are at a serious disadvantage when it comes to strength.

This fact is why men historically watched out for women and children. Feminists have destroyed men’s desire to do so with their histrionic anger and derogatory attitude. And so, women alone with children can be accosted in broad daylight by predators, and good men will continue to pump their gas and do nothing. And when the woman handles it herself, some men criticize her.

This is unacceptable. 

This girl is from Chicago and I do not play when my children are with me. You will back away from me and you will do it quickly. Ladies, don't let men do this to you. A loud and quick NO! Followed by DO NOT COME CLOSER will usually stop them. Rude is better than being a victim.

— Megan Fox (@MeganFoxWriter) July 31, 2022

Gentlemen, remember that there are many women out here who love and appreciate you for the heroes that you are and can be. Don’t let the screeching harpies keep you from coming to the aid of a woman in distress. And here’s a good tip if you need to ask a woman who is alone something: keep your distance, give her space, and back off immediately if she seems uncomfortable. It’s unkind to cause fear in someone unnecessarily. Look for a man to help you first, if possible.

Women, some of you are a problem, too. A few of you tweeted things at me like, “I always give them money or fill up their tank and it always comes back to me.” You’re the reason they prey on women. You are making the world more dangerous for women. You are making predators feel entitled to intimidate and scare women into giving them what they want. And you think you’re virtuous! Stop this. Give your charity to church or volunteer at soup kitchens where it is safe to do so. By encouraging panhandlers on the street to continue their hustle, you are putting your own life and the lives of my daughters in danger. Shame on you. You’re not some virtuous Saint Theresa when you allow grifters to scam you; you’re an enabling simpleton who is going to end up in a body bag at some point. Someone didn’t teach you how to survive in an urban environment. That’s going to backfire one day.

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I’m not going to be an easy target for a bad man. I’m a hard target. I will call you out, I will make trouble for you, I will run you over with my car. Whatever it takes to get away safely with my children, I WILL DO IT. I don’t care what you think about me, either. I’ve seen too many women victimized because they tried to be nice. I’m not nice, and you can find out the hard way or you can just stay away from me.

Choose a different target, jackals. I’m going to be way too much trouble for you to handle.