In the wake of Russia’s invasion of Ukraine, Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy is receiving lots of praise for his leadership, courage, and communication. Sometimes, it’s hard to believe this man, who is now being compared to Winston Churchill, is a former TV actor and comedian.
“Here’s a guy who was basically considered to be a lightweight, out of his element, about to be crushed by a major superpower next door. And it didn’t happen,” explained Andrew J. Polsky, a professor of political science at Hunter College in New York. “I think people really expected that he would flee … and I think he surprised people by sharing the danger that they were sharing.”
Zelenskyy has certainly exceeded expectations, unlike, say, Joe Biden, who has basically been a Putin puppet throughout his presidency, essentially allowing Russia to invade. History will remember Zelenskyy’s rising to the occasion despite his thinner political resume, while Biden will be remembered for his weakness and being outwitted by Putin.
It makes you wonder: What other comedians would have handled Putin better than Joe Biden? Well, I decided to give it some thought, and here’s my list.
Jerry Seinfeld
I think I could sum up Jerry Seinfeld’s foreign policy approach in four words: Look to the cookie.
In one iconic scene of his sitcom Seinfeld, Jerry boils down the problem of racial harmony in a relatively simple way.
“You see, Elaine, the key to eating a black and white cookie is that you wanna get some black and some white in each bite. Nothing mixes better than vanilla and chocolate. And yet still somehow racial harmony eludes us. If people would only look to the cookie, all our problems would be solved.”
Personally, I think Seinfeld’s Look To The Cookie approach to diplomacy would have worked better to contain Putin than what Biden tried.
Tim Allen
Tim Allen is known as the voice of Buzz Lightyear in the Toy Story franchise, as well as playing Tim “The Tool Man” Taylor on Home Improvement, and (my personal favorite) the conservative Mike Baxter on Last Man Standing. He’s recently spoken out about what’s happening in Ukraine, and frankly, I think he’s more troubled by Putin’s actions than Biden. Allen said on Twitter that he is “full of anger and disgust” with the recent events in Ukraine. “This is the definition of wrong. My head, heart, and soul pray for the people of Ukraine.”
My mind and body are full of anger and disgust at the coward putin ghouls that have attacked a sovereign country. This is the definition of wrong. My head, heart and soul pray for the people of Ukraine.
F-putin— Tim Allen (@ofctimallen) March 3, 2022
This sounds like a guy who wouldn’t have refused to impose meaningful sanctions on Putin before the invasion, does it? He can’t be any worse than Joe Biden.
Sam Kinison
Though Sam Kinison is no longer with us, I can’t help but think that he’d be handling Putin much better than Joe Biden has. If you’re not familiar with Kinison’s comedy or his legendary scream … well, let’s just say I think he’d be an intimidating force dealing with Putin.
A case in point would be this bit by Kinison on world hunger, which, I must warn you, is not family-friendly or safe for work.
Now imagine this guy dealing with Putin.
Russell Brand
Actor/comedian Russell Brand is another who surprisingly seems to have a better outlook on Russia’s invasion than Joe Biden or anyone else in his administration. One thing in particular that sticks out is his reacting to the barrage of “empty gestures” in support of Ukraine we’ve been seeing from politicians, pundits, and celebrities.
“Look at what happened in Canada. Some people said, ‘Oh, the thing about that truckers protest is that it’s a bit noisy and a bit of a nuisance.’ Yeah, that’s what protest is! You have to make a bit of a nuisance of yourself in order to be heard, because democracy does not afford you the right to do what you need to do,” Brand said. “What I fear is that we risk creating a world in where the only things allowed are empty gestures.”
Yeah, I’m all done with empty gestures myself. Biden’s empty gestures let Putin invade Ukraine in the first place.
“Oh no, there’s a war in Ukraine! Quick, do some empty gestures!” Brand mocked.
Brilliant from @rustyrockets: “Oh no! There’s a war in Ukraine! Quick! Do some empty gestures!” pic.twitter.com/7jut5Il7hd
— The Post Millennial (@TPostMillennial) March 6, 2022
Exactly. This attitude would translate well with working with our allies to contain Putin.
Bill Maher
Last month, before going on hiatus, Bill Maher explained the Russia/Ukraine situation on his HBO show Real Time by making a rather unique analogy. “Russia is Kanye. Ukraine is Kim Kardashian. NATO is Pete Davidson,” and, Maher explains, the relationship between Ukraine (Kardashian) and NATO (Davidson) “just drives Russia crazy.”
Is it the most intellectual analogy? Nope. Yet, it somehow is worlds ahead of Kamala’s layman’s explanation for the conflict: “So, Ukraine is a country in Europe. It exists next to another country called Russia,” Kamala explained. “Russia is a bigger country. Russia is a powerful country. Russia decided to invade a smaller country called Ukraine. So, basically, that’s wrong, and it goes against everything that we stand for.”
Now, wouldn’t you say that Maher’s analogy suggests he understands the Russia/Ukraine situation far more than Kamala Harris? It wouldn’t surprise me if he understands it more than Joe Biden does as well.
