Happy Friday Gentle Readers,
I hope this missive finds you well. Summer has finally arrived in the West, and I will spend this weekend prepping the backyard for concrete work. It is part of a backyard makeover, so that will allow us to entertain a bit more.
Back in my 40s, one of my hobbies, believe it or not, was creating custom patios and water features at home. Now that I am on the backside of my 50s, I am not ambitious or dumb enough to believe that just because I saw something on the DIY Network I could replicate it at my house. So maybe I'll just settle for buying a birdbath and calling it good.
How to cough like the opposite sex
The price of a college degree has been increasing at an exponential rate over the years. And, as many others have noted, the value of a college degree continues to drop at a corresponding rate. Then again, you knew that even before "students" began staging Hamas Jamborees on quads across the nation and engaging in fun terrorist summer camp activities. And it should come as no surprise that anyone that these perpetual grad-student factories continue to find ways to accelerate their plunge into irrelevance.
It is no longer enough to declare oneself to be the opposite sex (or make a sex up out of thin air). It is no longer sufficient to don a dress or pants that match the ever-changing color of one's hair. People can't even stop at amputating or appending the requisite body parts to assume the morphology of whatever it is they proclaim themselves to be.
Details count, you know. To that end, Russell Sage College in Albany, N.Y., is planning on offering a new program. According to The College Fix, the college's School of Health Sciences’ Speech and Language Center is set to roll out the Gender-Affirming Voice Program in the spring of 2025. The school's website said that the program is designed for “gender-diverse individuals who seek to modify their voices to match their identities.”
Participants in the program will “explore aspects of voice, like pitch, inflection, resonance, articulation, and loudness.” As part of the curriculum, there will be instructions on "non-verbal communication." Non-verbal communication includes sneezing, coughing, and throat clearing. the rationale for this because “these often affect listener perception of gender.” The site also notes:
Participants will receive 20 hours of training throughout a three-month period. The school receives funding through the New York State Department of Health to cover training for those without private insurance.
Wait, this is covered under insurance? Keep that in mind the next time your carrier denies one of your medical claims. I'm sure our soon-to-be Chinese overlords are giddy that Americans have become so self-indulgent that this is an actual medical concern.
I am a happily married man, but there was a time during my days as a bachelor when my battle cry was “Cherchez la femmes, pardieu! Cherchez la femmes!” Never once was my head ever turned by the sound of a woman hacking up a phlegm ball or snarffling into a tissue. Back me up, gentlemen. None of you ever said, "Man, she has got one hot sneeze! I need to get her number!" Right? Please tell me I'm right.
Wine recommendation
Because if colleges are teaching people to hack and sneeze like the sex of their choice, it is time to toast the decline of the nation.
How about a nice red to kick off the weekend? I offer you the 2023 Thousand Lives Cabernet Sauvignon.
While many reviewers have characterized it as "bold," this particular bottle was smooth and understated, with the just amount of requisite dryness for a Cabernet Sauvignon. The tannins run a little high, tending toward the middle of the road; ditto for the acidity.
Expect notes of red fruits, particularly cherry. Overall this is a pleasant Argentinian offering, which will pair well with the obvious red wine suspects in terms of food. It can work as a stand-alone, but it will be at its best with a meal. It retails for less than $10 a bottle, making it an affordable red for a dinner party or similar gathering.
That's it for me. Have a great weekend, and I'll see you next time.
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