Happy Friday, Gentle Readers,
The time has come at stately Brown Manor to decorate for Christmas. So bright and early tomorrow morning, I will venture into the deep recesses of the garage. There, I will disturb whatever black widow spiders and scorpions may have survived the last freeze and try to remember what boxes contain ornaments, lights, garlands, and whatever else we're hanging on the walls, doors, ceiling, etc.
We aren't doing outdoor lights this year. Women, like my wife, for some reason, prefer the tasteful, elegant, and streamlined look of solid white lights. I, being a guy, prefer a veritable riot of color when it comes to lights. So we have opted not to worry about it this year. Plus, years ago, the ladder slipped while I was hanging lights on the roof, and I still have flashbacks.
We did have one Christmas emergency. Our granddaughter called us on Wednesday. Her Elf on the Shelf had fallen from its perch and into the dog bowl. My granddaughter was afraid her elf had drowned and had called grandma, a nurse practitioner for advice. My wife told her to dry off Miss Elf, put her on the tree to rest, and put just a touch of hot cocoa with cinnamon on her lips. Being me, I suggested to my wife that Miss Elf might also like a splash of bourbon to aid in her recovery. Funny, no one in my family shares my sense of humor.
The gift that doesn't keep on giving.
Back in August, I told you about the City of Chicago, specifically Mayor Brandon Johnson and his staff, who announced that in honor of the first day of school, they would sponsor a pizza party. Of course, what was not made known ahead of time was the fact that the party would consist of city officials distributing frozen pizzas. And a good time was had by no one.
It is or should be, common knowledge that the cast of "Hee Haw" would have had greater success hosting nuclear disarmament talks than the city of Chicago would have hosting pretty much anything. This includes pizza parties and gun buyback programs. But when you're on a roll, keep on rolling.
ABC 7 in Chicago reported that on December 2, the city hosted a gun turn-in event at St. Sabina Church. The process was simple: bring in your gun, get a gift card, no questions asked. This seems odd for a blue city, but maybe the questions would be asked after the serial numbers were traced. There was no report on the value of the gift cards and whether or not people got a fair sum for their guns.
For some, that question would be moot since a number of the gift cards were expired. Talk about getting you-know-what with your pants on. Here you are, trying to be a good citizen and turn in your gun in a city in which it would probably come in handy for silly things like self-defense. And what do you get for your troubles? An expired gift card. You don't even get a frozen pizza. The Chicago Police Department apologized profusely and offered replacements. One would think that a department of trained observers would have the foresight to check the expiration dates on the cards before handing them out. But this is Chicago, after all.
The irony here is that anyone who turned in a gun for a defunct gift card would probably never use a gun in the commission of a crime. Those who would use a gun illegally would simply get another illegal gun and keep the gift card. And in the era of blue city smash-and-grabs, who needs a gift card, anyway? But we must keep hope alive, even if that hope is like rearranging the pink flamingos and garden gnomes as the house goes up in flames.
Wine recommendation
Because I need to fortify myself before taking on the mutant arachnids and arthropods in my garage.
So I've done two whites in a row. So, in the spirit of diversity, equity, and inclusion, I give you the 2021 Larchago Tempranillo.
Like Chicago, I haven't been on a winning streak recently. Most of my picks could be characterized as "serviceable" or "agreeable." Maybe "unobjectionable." This Tempranillo was no exception. It is pretty much middle of the road in every respect. It has a nice ruby color and would be a decent compliment to most red-wine dishes. It should satisfy most red fans. It is very dry and slightly high in tannins and acids but hangs out pretty much on the center line.
Look for a little oak in the flavor, along with cherries and maybe a dash of chocolate. If you are looking for a good table wine or need to stock up on reds for a Christmas or New Year's party, this would be the one. Normally, one would not think of a Tempranillo as a dessert wine, but you might want to match it up with a good mousse or the best dessert I ever had: a bag full of dark chocolate chips. Okay, that is not exactly a gourmet suggestion, but don't knock it until you've tried it.
That's it for me. Have a great weekend, and I'll see you next time.
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