How to Groom Children and Get Paid to Do it: Drag Camp for Kids!

(AP Photo/David Goldman)

Hey Libs, If the groomers can’t get to your kids, bring your kids to the groomers — and bring your checkbook.

A group based in Vancouver, Canada, called “Carousel Theatre For Young People” (CTYP), is offering to groom your kids. And here’s the kicker: they want parents to pay them to do it.


CYTP is offering a drag queen camp for teens and juniors.

CYTP will teach your 7 to 11-year-old gender-bender how to don makeup, zip a dress, and shake his tail feathers for a mere $460 Canadian dollars. If your budding ladyboy is between the ages of 12 and 17, that’s gonna cost you Can$900. I can’t figure out why there is almost a 100% difference in the price for the two age groups.

Good news! The “tuition” doesn’t just teach your son how to give a lap dance — it includes a drag makeup kit!

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The drag camp runs four or five days, depending on which dates you pick, and goes from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. In less than a week, your son Carl can become Carla and thrust his hips at a roomful of creeps, then panhandle the rotters for tips.

Inner Diva

Check out the pitch the groomers are spinning to get your kids away from you and into a sequined cocktail dress and matching heels. They even offer a two-week grooming plan to separate your kids from you for 10 days of indoctrination!

Do you enjoy expressing yourself through clothing, makeup and performance? Do you have an alter ego that is just waiting to hit the stage? Our new two week senior Drag Camp might be just your cup of tea, honey! Led by some of Vancouver’s established and emerging drag artists, you’ll learn how to access your inner confidence, show your true colours, and maybe even let out that inner diva! Join some of Vancouver’s most amazing drag artists and learn how drag can brighten up your life!   You might be wondering, is drag for kids? Drag is for everyone! Parents, ask yourself, what’s the difference between what you wear at home versus what you wear at work? You’re doing drag honey, you just don’t know it!


Whereas drag shows for adults have been a mainstay form of entertainment for centuries, the push to have men in dresses bump and grind with kids is fairly new — and disturbing.

DRAG-O-RAMA! The 45 goals of Communism were entered into the Congressional record in 1963. Check out #25: Present homosexuality, degeneracy, and promiscuity as “normal, natural, and healthy.”


Good news! For those Canadians not interested in their son becoming the belle of the ball and who prefer he becomes the rock of the rink, Vancouver is also offering summer hockey camp. For $20 less than teaching your kid to sashay, he can learn to be the next Gordie Howe.


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