Oh Sure, But Try Getting a Decent Glass of Dihydrogen Monoxide There

Howard Portnoy has your “Emperor’s-new-clothes alert: First café serving only water opens in NYC” at Hot Air — a name which in this case covers half the molecules served at what literally is a watering hole:

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“I’ll start with an order of water, move on to some H20, and, to drink, I’d like a glass of your finest vintage water.”

The above restaurant order is fictitious but the menu is not. Neither is the restaurant. Its name is Molecule, and it is the first water-only café to open in New York City and possibly the nation.

So what’s so special about the water at Molecule? Is it distilled from the most pristine mountain stream on the planet? No, actually it comes from a New York City tap, but the restaurant justifies charging $1 and up per serving because their water is filtered through a custom-built $25,000 purifier that “uses ultraviolet rays, ozone treatments and reverse osmosis in a seven-stage processing treatment.”

An article in the Wall Street Journal (one of few positive reviews) hails Molecule as “a cocktail bar for water enthusiasts,” though those who prefer to do their drinking in private can always order 3- and 5-gallon jugs of the store’s “pharmaceutical-grade water” for home delivery (via tricycle!).

Adam Ruhf, one the café’s co-owner, told DNAinfo.com, “It’s about treating water a little more consciously, mindfully and respectfully. We are trying to change the way people think about water.”

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And thus, the ultimate libational statement of Mike Bloomberg’s New York has finally arrived. Or as Hot Air’s Allahpundit would say, it’s come to this. I can see why plenty of New Yorkers long for the bad old days: at least the food — and drink — was better.

(My wife, who grew up in Manhattan replies, “Meh. I give it three months.”)

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