Tranheuser-Busch — oh, sorry, that’s Anheuser-Busch — is panicking. Sales of Bud Light have been in the gutter ever since it presented the ubiquitous fingernails-on-chalkboard fake woman Dylan Mulvaney as the new face of the brand, and there is no sign that the alleged beer will break out of its nosedive anytime soon. And so now, Anheuser-Busch’s obediently woke but desperate marketing wonks are giving the stuff away, offering a $20 rebate on a $19.98 case of Bud Light. Can patriots be bought for two cents and some watery beer? We shall see.
Meanwhile, if a couple of pennies isn’t inducement enough to get the guys who used to drink Bud Light to go back to what has now been dubbed the “tranny fluid,” Anheuser-Busch has decided to have Bud Light imitate Mulvaney and make its own transition: its familiar blue bottles will soon give way to camouflage packaging. One can picture the cynical millennial marketing team saying, “That’ll bring those redneck rubes back. They love the military and war.” Bud Light might as well put up billboards nationwide saying, “Please, patriots, don’t be angry, even though we haven’t apologized, and buy our beer again!” But the beer baron’s cynicism and desperation are palpable.
The New York Post reported Wednesday that “a Bud Light seller apparently stuck with too many cases of the unsold brew in the wake of the company’s Dylan Mulvaney fiasco is offering $20 rebates on purchases of a $19.98 case of beer.” The Post added: “A photo posted to social media shows stacks of 24-can cases of Bud Light with a promo taped to them touting a full rebate from the unidentified beer vendor.”
One Twitter user, former heavyweight boxer Ed Latimore, tweeted a photo showing how beer drinkers could get paid two cents by Anheuser-Busch for taking a case of Bud Light off their hands. Latimore observed: “Things can’t be going great if they’re basically giving it away…” Another Twitter user responded: “Judging by the stock on that shelf, they can’t even do that.”
Indeed. The Post noted that “nationwide retail sales of the brand were down 23.6% versus a year ago in the week ending May 6 — its fifth straight week of declines, according to Bump Williams Consulting and NielsenIQ data.” And it’s not only Bud Light. Budweiser is “down 9.7% versus an 11.4% drop a week earlier; Michelob Ultra, down 2.9% versus 4.3%; and Natural Light, down 2.5% versus 5.2% the previous week.”
Meanwhile, the Post reported Tuesday that panicked Anheuser-Busch top dogs last week “held a meeting at its US headquarters in St. Louis with distributors to discuss its strategy for dealing with the backlash.” One plan these geniuses came up with was “a temporary redesign of its Budweiser and Bud Light aluminum bottles.” This will involve producing bottles “with a camouflage print and images of the ‘Folds of Honor’ program, which provides educational scholarships for children and spouses of fallen and disabled American military service members and first responders.”
This is apparently designed to demonstrate that Bud Light is not the Drag Queen of Beers and that the brand is just as supportive of patriots as it is of deluded men pretending to be women such as Dylan Mulvaney. But as the Anheuser-Busch executives came up on this, they must have had an uneasy feeling: it’s unlikely to work.
This is because Bud Light has become a cultural joke. On Tuesday, Outkick tweeted: “The Oakland A’s announced attendance on Monday night was the lowest figure for a game in Oakland since the 1970’s, and one of the lowest numbers in MLB history And video from the game shows even that estimate may have been too high.” One of the first responses was “Was it free Bud Light night?” Maybe Bud Light will eventually right the ship and regain its former preeminence, but it seems doubtful. Not only are customers fleeing the brand, but it has become the veritable poster child of the adage “Go woke, go broke,” and walking around with a Bud Light has become a public endorsement of the transgender madness and the Left’s relentless efforts to false us all to accept their fantasies and delusions.
Unless you’re slightly to the Left of Angela Davis, you don’t want to be seen in public with a Bud Light these days. And the people who are slightly to the Left of Angela Davis generally shun Bud Light as a beer of those fictional people who so dominate their delusions and illusions about the world, white supremacist redneck yahoos who voted for Trump. Here’s my two cents, if not the two cents Anheuser-Busch will give you for drinking its swill: Bud Light is going to keep nosediving.
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