Dear Funny or Die: There's Nothing Funny About Crushing Babies to Death

Funny or Die has probably been on your Facebook feed once or twice. It is a project founded by a spoiled rich kid who asked his very wealthy father to fund his frat-humor-turned-money-maker online comedy show. The wealthy daddy-benefactor is Mark Kvamme, who happens to be Governor Kasich’s sugar daddy. Kasich has been flying around in Kvamme’s jet with his campaign. Unfortunately for Kasich (and Mark Kvamme), Michael Kvamme (pampered trust-fund baby) seems to think that Planned Parenthood’s scandalous and barbaric —  not to mention illegal — methods of altering abortions to preserve organs to sell on the open market is funny. On a separate note, his father ought to be supremely embarrassed that Michael wrote,

Michael Kvamme, an aspiring young comedian, came up with a concept for a new kind of comedy site and told his dad, Mark Kvamme of Sequoia Capital to write a check.

Yuck. Does it get anymore rich privilege than that?

While taking breaks from his indoor roller coaster, Michael, or Richie Rich (as he prefers to be known), has put out one of his lame “comedy” videos to prove how funny this fetal tissue baby-part-selling scandal really is.

Cue the Planned Parenthood talking points:

Planned Parenthood welcomes all women.

Planned Parenthood gave me birth control.

Planned Parenthood screened me for cancer.

Fetal tissue Baby organs are important because Parkinson’s!

All of this is told by what I think might be minor celebrities (or semi-successful comedians) I’ve never heard of who are wearing what appears to be North Korean prison garb and speaking in histrionics, as if what Planned Parenthood does is awful…which it is. No one, and I mean NO ONE is upset at Planned Parenthood for giving pap smears, physicals, breast exams, or prenatal care (which I’m still doubtful they do. We know they don’t do mammograms. And who goes to an abortion clinic for prenatal care? Wouldn’t you be worried they’d mix up your chart and leave you un-pregnant?) Absolutely EVERYONE with a brain (and functioning conscience) is appalled at what they are doing to fully formed, sometimes viable babies who have been aborted.

The most recent undercover video shows an ex-employee of StemExpress, Holly O’Donnell, who gives her account of other StemExpress employees taking blood samples from women and fetal tissue their aborted babies for research without their consent!

There were times where they would take what they wanted. And these mothers don’t know, and there’s no way they would know.

She also tells of her experience watching a Planned Parenthood abortionist with a scary bedside manner.

He had a reputation for going viciously fast…if we didn’t watch him, we would lose our specimens. If there wasn’t a girl in the room, he [Dr. Berman] would get mad. He would pace the hallways if there wasn’t something to do…like he wanted to do it.

Somebody call the exorcists!

This new video has price lists on Planned Parenthood letterhead clearly showing the going rates for fetal baby livers, hearts, brains, and more, absolutely destroying Planned Parenthood’s denials of wrongdoing.

I’m surprised that this Funny or Die sketch didn’t go for broke and just make fun of aborted babies, like the pro-abortion Left usually does. Normally, when they are feeling secure in their dominance, they’ll really go for the disgusting abortion jokes. None of that is in this video, which leads me to believe that they know exactly how much trouble Planned Parenthood is in and this is the best damage control they can manage. Don’t look behind the curtain at the pie plate of bloody arms and legs! Look over here at our birth-control packages! And look how cool we are with our young, bespectacled feminists and sort-of celebrities!

Normally Funny or Die can attract big names to spoof their cause-of-the-moment, but it looks like this time none of the big time actors or celebs want anything to do with Planned Parenthood, because seriously…who are these people?

I just finished reading Abby Johnson’s book UnPlanned, the story of a former Planned Parenthood director (which you should go purchase on Amazon right now). Planned Parenthood recruited her in college, using the most diabolical argument I have ever heard. Johnson told the recruiter she was pro-life and the Planned Parenthood robot nodded in agreement and said Planned Parenthood’s goal is to reduce the number of abortions through birth control. Well, who wouldn’t be in agreement with that? Eight years later, and witnessing Planned Parenthood building bigger and better abortion facilities to abort bigger and older babies — while demanding she meet “abortion quotas” to bring up their bottom line — Johnson finally saw them for what they are, just like the rest of us are seeing now.

Planned Parenthood are money-grubbing liars. They make the majority of their money on abortions. It is the only revenue-generating “service” they offer. They make no money from parenthood, no money from adoption, and no money off government birth control. The cash cow is abortion and now, the selling of human organs to the highest bidder.

You know who else seems to be a money-grubbing liar?

“Pro-life” John Kasich who has no problem taking money from these unfunny losers.