I didn’t notice that the NY Jets had Ukraine flag stickers on their helmets because I stopped watching football when Colin Kaeperflunkie started taking a knee to oppose whatever it was the half-white dude from a lovely home was wetting his vacant, nonbinary jock strap over.
Why in the world do the NY Jets have Ukraine flags on their helmets. pic.twitter.com/EsCDv7TQF5
— Citizen Free Press (@CitizenFreePres) September 24, 2023
FACT-O-RAMA! It is easier to walk away from the NFL when you have spent your life being a Lions fan, so I’ve got that going for me, which is nice.
Speaking of knees, the NFL is happy to bend theirs in vomitous obeisance to all things woke yet thumb their noses at the real Americans who make up their fan base.
In 2021, the NFL decided social justice campaigns were cool. Fields were adorned with messages like “It Takes All of Us” and “End Racism.” Players were allowed to decorate their helmets with messages such as “Stop Hate,” “Black Lives Matter,” and “George Floyd.” I’d don a prom dress and guzzle Bud Light if I could watch a player wear a “Dorothy Dow” sticker on his brain bucket.
Though the NFL is as woke as a child waiting for Santa, they are picky about which causes they’ll embrace.
When a black man shot ten white Dallas police officers protecting a BLM parade, five of whom died, the Cowboys chose to honor the dead with decals on their helmets. The NFL, which gave the green light to a George Floyd sticker, decided murdered cops aren’t as worthy a cause as a dead, life-long criminal and forbade the team from wearing them.
CLAM-O-RAMA! The NY Yankees and NY Mets had to fightMajor League Baseball (MLB) to wear caps honoring the first responders of 9/11.
Surprise to no one, the war money-laundering scheme taking place in Ukraine is down with the clowns of the NFL. Players, dripping with ignorance regarding Eastern European geopolitics, compliantly adorned their helmets with flags they would otherwise not recognize if it wasn’t for the sheeple mentality that has made them a fixture on the social media profiles of lefty jackpuddings.
It’s easy to predict which topics the neo-bolshies will embrace and which they’ll scoff at. They declared war on plastic straws when one was found in the schnoz of a living turtle but turned a blind blowhole on the roughly 16-plus dead whales that washed up on the beaches of Long Island and New Jersey in 2023, due to what many scientists believe may be caused by the sonar used in planting windmill farms.
STOCK PILE-O-RAMA! The NFL should ask themselves why their coolers of $18 cans of Bud Light aren’t moving.
As much as I miss watching the Lions disappoint the Motor City year after year, I can’t bring myself to watch a sport that honors dead criminals and never-ending profit-generating wars but ignores mass-murdered cops.
Thank God for college football and professional hockey. #GoWolverines #GoRedWings
PS: My wonderful Chief Editor is a fan of that team of contemptible tatterdemalions from south of Michigan’s border whose name I can’t recall. Let’s see if I can slip the hat-tip to the University of Michigan hashtag without getting clown-slapped.
Editor’s note: Ann Arbor—North till you smell it, west till you step in it. And that’s the final word on this topic.
Join the conversation as a VIP Member