Buzz Ballad: Get Me to Vegas On Time

Finally, the White House releases the Presidential conversation from 9/11/12:

Get Me to Vegas On Time
—apologies to Lerner & Loewe, and “Get Me to the Church On Time” 

There’s just a few more hours
You can’t be in a daze
A few more hours
And you’ll have to fundraise…
There’s dollars to be raised all over Vegas
And I’ve got to go after them in just a few more hours;

I am fundraising in the morning
Upwards my war-chest’s gonna climb
Although something nasty
Is going down in Benghazi
Get me to Vegas on time!

I’ve got to fly out in the morning
Campaigning on the taxpayers’ dime
So please, you must hold all
Ambassadors’ phone calls
And get me to Vegas on time!

If someone objects, then don’t you know
Susan Rice will just blame a video!

‘Cause I’ll be in Vegas in the morning
With my Teleprompter I will shine
Claiming we’ve made a
Shell out of al-Qaeda
Get me to Vegas on time

I can’t be bothered with sending drones
I’ll just deflect by saying that the facts weren’t known

Yes, I’ll be in Vegas in the morning
My derelictions are ne’er a crime
Somebody, hand down
Troops orders to stand down
Get me to Vegas on time

Leave our personnel to their own fate
It’s just some crazies who had to demonstrate

I’m flying to Vegas in the morning
Upwards my war-chest’s gonna climb
Each one of you all try
To be a good fall guy
And get me to Vegas
Get me to Vegas
For my sake get me to Vegas on time!