Once, around 2012, fresh out of college (more or less) with a political science bachelor’s degree from a mid-tier state university with no real prospects, I landed a gig in Atlanta based on a Craigslist ad — a forum in which I wouldn’t recommend looking for anything ever except as a last resort.
“Help us save the environment!” was the gist of the ad headline — something to that effect; I don’t remember the exact verbiage.
I like the environment, I thought to myself.
And, more importantly, I needed money.
Related: Diverse Fat Activist Gets Paid to Lie to Children About Nutrition for Corporate Profit
So I applied for the opening, eager to simultaneously eat real food and save the world.
As instructed, I showed up in midtown in some office building on a Tuesday afternoon, where a dozen other twenty-something and maybe even teenage idealists assembled before our Dear Leader, a 30-something future hardcore Karen with a butch crew cut that demonstrated that she meant business.
(Pro-tip: As an aside, as a rule of thumb that I’ve learned the hard way over the years, the kind of jobs where you show up for orientation with dozens of other people probably indicate a high turnover rate, which probably indicates that the job sucks.)
She handed out the scripts we were supposed to read to the white people in the suburbs whose doors we would knock on unsolicited.
This is how it went.
“Do you want to help us save the Chattahoochee River?” we were to ask.
“Yes, I love the Chattahoochee River,” was the response we were trying to evoke.
“Well, Republicans hate the Chattahoochee River and the environment at large,” was the next statement.
“Oh no!” they would scream and clutch their pearls.
“The good news is the Georgia Democrats love you and the environment in equal measure. Give us your address and some money and we’ll fix that river right up.”
(Needless to say, I didn’t last long in the role. Back to tending the Jason’s Deli™ dishwasher I went.)
So that’s pretty much what we’ve got here, only swapping pseudo-environmentalism for vaccine pimping.
Related: Chelsea Clinton Launches Anti-MAHA Podcast
“Do you love The Science™”? notoriously corrupt Democrat money laundering operation ActBlue asks through its cut-out, “Vax Pac.”
“Of course I love The Science™! I still pray five times a day to my Fauci shrine, facing Washington!” the NPC wine mom responds.
Now that you’ve got the pump primed, it’s time to close the deal.
“Great. Let’s get that checkbook out and get to work saving Tim Walz and Pfizer — I mean, the children. The children!”
Via Vax PAC (emphasis added):
When leaders ignore science and play politics with public health, everyone pays the price.
Vaccines are under attack. The CDC, FDA, and all of our healthcare institutions are being decimated. Food safety has been abandoned. mRNA technology that could save someone you love from cancer has become the target of partisans.
We need your help to fight back. Every gift fuels this fight. With your help, we can support courageous candidates*, reach more voters, share the truth, and hold leaders accountable.
Government scientists and researchers cannot speak out without fear of retribution - but we can. That’s why we're building one of the largest coalitions of scientists and advocates to fight back.
Vax PAC is led by doctors, researchers, and activists working to change that by holding politicians accountable and advocating for policies that defend your access to medicine, protect medical research, and put your health above politics.
Together, we can debunk disinformation, support evidence-based science, and promote peer-reviewed research.
“Your money, our bank account. Stronger together!”
