Lamest Presidential Campaign Ever Gets Even More Pathetic

AP Photo/Patrick Semansky

We’ve been told that doddering Joe Biden commanded 81 million votes in the 2020 election, despite being forced to campaign mostly from his Wilmington, Del., residence for fear of the dread virus that stalked the land. The official Biden-Harris campaign headquarters, however, was in Philadelphia, and it was amply manned with wily staffers. Ultimately, the concerted efforts of the entire Leftist establishment were enough to drag the coot over the finish line.

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Since then, time hasn’t been Biden’s friend. He has proved the disastrous nature of his “leadership” with painful inflation, weaponized federal agencies, abject failure in Afghanistan, and utter disinclination to temper the bloody meat grinder in Ukraine. So when Biden mumbled something about running for reelection, most Americans were in a state of disbelief. Dismally unpopular and observably senescent, the man seemed like a weak candidate indeed. He confirmed that assessment with his pathetic campaign announcement via a prerecorded video amidst disheartening poll numbers.

Flashback to April 2023: Lamest Campaign Launch Ever: Biden Loses to Generic Republican 41%–47%

So you can be forgiven for thinking Biden’s lame reelection campaign couldn’t get much lamer. But then again, this is Joe Biden we’re talking about, so of course it can!

In a story called “Biden announces his 2024 campaign headquarters,” Politico delivers some underwhelming news:

President Joe Biden will make his longtime residence of Wilmington, Del., the headquarters of his 2024 campaign, he announced Tuesday.

“My family’s values, my eternal optimism and my unwavering belief in the American middle class as our nation’s backbone comes from my home — from Delaware,” Biden said in a statement. “That’s why there is no better place for our reelection campaign to have its headquarters.”

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Wow: the Big Guy is barely bothering to phone it in this time. Biden was always well-known (more so in recent years but also as a senator) for frequently escaping the capitol to spend time at one of his Delaware residences. But this seems to be a case of making his campaign strategy conform to his existing lifestyle. I guess we should be grateful he can be bothered to campaign at all; as Joe’s age catches up with him, he has trouble doing such things as staying up for important alliance events or staying awake long enough to complete a sentence.

Biden’s campaign was already pretty pathetic, to be sure. Since the April launch, the campaign team consisted of four — count ’em — staffers. On Monday, the effort announced the addition of three whole new staffers, bringing the grand total up to seven. How anyone can run an effective campaign to be the leader of the free world with just seven staffers is anyone’s guess.

Of course, this supreme lack of effort reinforces the belief of people like myself that Biden is in no way going to be the actual Democrat candidate in 2024. I am absolutely convinced the White House team will be swapping him out with someone more lively (Newsom is currently the odds-on favorite), probably sometime in early 2024.

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Related: Time to Make Joe Biden’s Neurological and Cognitive Medical Records an Issue

But then again, maybe Biden’s lame campaign is just fine. People who vote for barely sentient candidates like Joe Biden or John Fetterman aren’t really voting for that person; they’re voting for left-wing policies and the nameless, faceless bureaucrats who codify and execute them. So long as Biden is capable of performing the final formality — holding a pen and signing his name — he’ll do just fine for these voters.

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