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Help Me, David Plouffe, You’re My Only Hope

September 18th, 2013 - 12:38 pm

Desperate times for Professor Ditherton Wiggleroom, in perennially over his head:

With his poll numbers falling and his second-term floundering so far, Obama has sought help from the former aides who helped catapult him to the presidency.

When the president held a recent strategy meeting on the Syria conflict, for example, he invited former political adviser David Plouffe, former White House press secretary Robert Gibbs, former chief speechwriter Jon Favreau and former National Security Council spokesman Tommy Vietor to attend.

Ex-advisers like Plouffe, Gibbs and David Axelrod routinely participate in calls with current White House staffers, and Obama has invited the first-term all-stars to strategy sessions on other issues too, former aides said.

Couple problems. All of these guys are great at winning elections, at making Republicans look bad. Although oftentimes making Republicans look bad is no more difficult than making puppies look adorable. But none of these guys (all white, BTW) are exactly aces at that whole governing thing. No offense, it just isn’t their strong suit.

On the foreign policy side, it’s simply too late. The rest of the world has taken its measure of Wiggleroom, and the damage is done. Instead of an Apology Tour, the next President is going to have to go on a Could You Believe That Guy? Tour.

If Wiggleroom were serious about fixing what’s wrong domestically, the fix is pretty simple — and David Axelrod can keep himself and his ninth-grade moustache in Chicago. All Wiggleroom needs to do is get behind a repeal effort for ObamaCare and Dodd-Frank — and rein in the EPA’s war on cheap energy. He’d have a willing ally in John Boehner, and I suspect Harry Reid would go along with most anything, provided he got his palm greased.

But it will never happen.

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