You’ll need:
Two slices whole wheat bread.
Crapload of turkey meat, white or dark your choice.
Four slices thick-cut pepper bacon.
Three slices fresh tomato, seeds removed.
Couple nice big pieces of Romaine lettuce.
Mayo (the real stuff).
Gulden’s mustard (nothing else will do here).
Kosher salt & pepper.
The order is important — you don’t want the sammich getting soggy. So, mayo on one slice of bread, mustard on the other. Put the lettuce on the side with the mayo. Put the tomatoes on top of the lettuce, add some salt & pepper to the tomatoes, then finish with the turkey, then the bacon. And the mustard slice of bread on top. Squish down and bite in.
Yeah, that’s been breakfast, lunch, and dinner for almost two days now.
UPDATE: I’m giving serious thought to attempting a layer of rare roast beef on top of the bacon. Science says it can’t be done, so wish me luck.
Baked country ham.
Just sayin’
Umm. I’ll be right over. Should I stop for beer first?
What, ten pounds of meat, a brick of starch, a scoop of mayo, and then “seeds removed”?
Have a suggested potent potable pairing for it?
And I scoff at your scientists who say the rare roast beef cannot top the bacon. The spicy mustard screams for some rare roast beefy goodness.
“Science says it can’t be done…..”
Have you subjected this claim to peer review yet? If you have provided a full data set above, I may have to try to replicate your results.
OK, after two days of eating various combinations turkey, gravy, mashed potatoes and bread, I was ready to take a rest today and focus on green leafies and other veggies.
Then I read your post and realized that I have everything you describe in my kitchen (well, the bacon isn’t peppered, but it is thick-sliced), with at least one addition: ripe avocados.
OK, tomorrow I’ll stick to veggies. ..bruce..
Oh, and to make things worse (or, more accurately, better), I also have some leftover baby portabello mushrooms — no, not for the sandwich (they’d just fall out) but to saute in the bacon grease once the bacon is done cooking (I’ve already started it).
Oh, man, I’m in trouble. Thanks a lot, Steve. ..bruce..
Lightly toasting the bread solves the potential sogginess problem, makes the sandwich more structurally sound when you really start to pile things up, and adds some nice firm texture to balance out all of the squishy stuff in the middle.
And I have to agree with “arhooley:” removing the tomato seeds is kinda silly. They don’t bite back. I promise. Of course, that’s assuming your tomatoes are fresh and firm (no, that’s *not* an innuendo – this time). “bfwebster’s” suggestion of ripe avocado has significant merit as well – I’d use that instead of mayo, but that’s just me.
Arhooley & Scandi –
I’ve nothing against tomato seeds & juice. Whenever we’ve got really good tomatoes, I just stand over the sink and eat’em.
But the ones you get this time of year have too much juice and too little flesh, and I *hate* soggy bread.
I did toast the bread, and I didn’t remove the tomato seeds (not that there were many to remove; mine were more flesh than seeds). I did have fresh smashed avocado — on the mustard slice (actually worked quite well). Didn’t have Guilden’s mustard; used a stoneground horseradish mustard instead. Didn’t have Romaine; used iceberg. Had two sandwiches, plus the mushrooms sauteed in the leftover bacon grease.
Burp. But it’s a happy burp. A contented burp. Great recommendation, Steve. ..bruce..
@Stephen Green -
Well, I guess that’s the trade-off for living in Cali – frigtarded government, great tomatoes year ’round.
Well, after reading this I was compelled to repair to
my bunkthe kitchen to try and validate the scientific claim. My findings are here.In the interest of peer review, we need photos of said sandwich.
We did our turkey day in Canada in October. Next one is at Christmas so I have to try this.
Anyone know where to get Guilden’s in Alberta?
Hail Steve and all other Gastronomic Explorers making it safe for future navigators of the Alimentary Canal. Further Research is needed in these important Recyclables. Perhaps some Federal Stimulous Money is available to help fund your research which has real world applications. Talk about Shovel Ready, I’m about ready to shovel one of the above described variations.
Bravo Steve abd to all your Colleages Bravo
I disagree. This, my friend, is the TURKEY SANDWICH OF THE GODS.
http://www.grotto11.com/blog/archive/1135750352.shtml
Whole wheat? For post-Thanksgiving? No, no, no. Sourdough–but only from a real bakery (Panera Bread need not apply, thank you very much), and certainly not toasted.
And as your (Southern) wife should have told you, no post-Thanksgiving turkey sandwich is complete without sweet pickles.
Needs potato chips (Your choice, I like Utz salt and vinegar) between the meat and the veggies.
Since turkey day here was done at one of the outlaws, no leftovers for moi, well, except for pies as the wife-unit is the official holiday piesmith for the family. Pecan, pumpkin and mince, oh my!
A most excellent flied lice from a local hole in the wall cat abattoir that we’ve been patronized for decades was the food of choice the day after.
Pizza from the local shop that the daughter works at provided the comestibles yesterday.
And a local Messkin joint did the dirty deed today. Celebrate diversity.
I am thinking a slab of Virginia ham would be just the ticket on that sammich, kind of a variation on a cordon bleu theme
MMMM – good sandwich Stephen! Share. As for mayo – converted to Duke’s Mayonnaise ever since moving south of the Mason Dixon Line. That is some good mayo. And I never cared for mayo before!
Well, you have most of the sandwich right….just add the beef and yank the turkey! Then you are on track to good eating….sort of a modified BLT! For Duchess and I we enjoy the 7-seed sprouted bread with our sandwiches as I find bread has taken on a new importance in sandwichland!
By the way….we (I) got in touch with our “Tito’s” vodka fix through a post on your site. Now it is standard fare at our Tampa Elks Lodge, and we keep a BIG bottle in the freezer at home for those “special” martinis…..we use NO additions to the Tito’s except some ice…..why spoil a perfect drink!