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by
Buzzsawmonkey

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September 12, 2011 - 7:56 pm

—apologies to “Barnacle Bill the Sailor”

“Who’s demanding joint session?
Who’s demanding joint session?
Who’s demanding joint session?”
Cried the US Congress

“For you I sent—I’m the President”
Said Pass-the-Bill-Now Obama
“I want to inform you of my intent”
Said Pass-the-Bill-Now Obama
“I want you to fast-track my jobs bill
If I say “Pass it now” then I know you will
Who cares if there’s no money in the till?”
Said Pass-the-Bill-Now Obama

“You have sent us no bill yet
You have sent us no bill yet
You have sent us no bill yet,”
Cried the US Congress

“That’s just a detail, so don’t you wail,”
Said Pass-the-Bill-Now Obama
“We’ll get full employment and high-speed rail,”
Said Pass-the-Bill-Now Obama
“My principles I have outlined
It’s your job to see that they’re combined
Because I like to lead from behind,”
Said Pass-the-Bill-Now Obama

“What about the Stimulus?
What about the Stimulus?
What about the Stimulus?
Cried the US Congress

“The jobs weren’t shovel-ready then,”
Said Pass-the-Bill-Now Obama
“That’s why I need you to spend again,”
Said Pass-the-Bill-Now Obama
“I’ll raise taxes on all the nobs
To subsidize union flash mobs
And maybe create a couple of jobs,”
Said Pass-the-Bill-Now Obama

“But we have to read the bill,
But we have to read the bill,
But we have to read the bill,”
Cried the US Congress

“Such niceties you should ignore,”
Said Pass-the-Bill-Now Obama
“You never asked to read the bill before,”
Said Pass-the-Bill-Now Obama
“What’s in the bill? Why should you care?
Just pass it and you’ll find out what’s there
You have my word you’ll pay your fair share,”
Said Pass-the-Bill-Now Obama

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