Welcome to Showbiz Assassin, your weekly dose of celebrity dross.
Every Wednesday, I’ll bring you a sort of “Page Six” round-up of Hollywood news — if “Page Six” were written by a snotty, right-wing broad with a GenX sensibility, a 20-gauge shotgun, and appallingly low-brow taste.
(And if you’re wondering about the name of the column, it’s from one of the only Japanese exports I’ve ever enjoyed, a show they used to play on Canadian TV in the 1980s that I called Samurai Babysitter before the internet was invented.)
And now: onward and downward, from the best to the worst in the week’s celebrity news…
1. Am I the last to notice?
As a cadet at Texas A&M circa 1968, presidential candidate RICK PERRY looks eerily like ROTC rage-aholic (and future fragging victim) “Neidermeyer” from Animal House:
I fondly remember that show. It was called Iron Samurai and it aired on the fledgling,taxpayer funded TVO. It was always introduced by the earnest president of Honda.The company had just opened a taxpayer subidized plant near Toronto. Just coincidence, I’m sure. Anyway the show was great fun.
The movies were spin-offs of a long-running manga (Japanese comics) series, the English title of which is “Lone Wolf and Cub.” The series is still in print, available from Amazon and others. The dark, goofy humor that you enjoyed in the film version is less constrained in the manga. It does for the Samurai genre what Monty Python did for (to?) the King Arthur legend.
Yes indeed- Lone Wolf and Cub. There’s actually a new movie for American audiences coming out soon, directed by Justin Lin of Fast/Furious fame. Should be pretty awesome, and faithful to the original
We have much to be excited about, eh? A friend of mine at CAA tells me that Justin Lin’s Lone Wolf and Cub is going to stick close to the original manga. I’m all for it!
Pedophilia in Hollywood: a “moral panic”?
With that much money at stake, the planet’s most evil people gravitate like crazy. Just seeing and hearing the level of perversion and lack of judgment that Hollywood admits to doing (and considers to be “no big deal”), what they’re doing behind closed doors is definitely beyond our comprehension. Tinseltown is amoral enough when sober. When drunk and stoned, you bet they’re gonna rape children!
Check out “Ultimate Evil” by Terry Maury. One portion of it deals with the hideous flop “The Cotton Club.” In the financing of that film, a twisted cult was involved, money was brought in from criminals overseas, and people wound up dead in the desert. That sort of madness doesn’t just go into the making of flops.
Also for “moral panic” fun: Try looking into the False Memory Syndrome Foundation (the folks who show up as “expert witnesses” to testify that kids have had their minds filled with bogus rapes by the “leading questions of zealot therapists.”) The founders of that group ran a porno magazine called “Finger” that featured stories about raping children. Their goal is to keep pedophiles out of prison. They are not scientists; they are pedophilia advocates.
Sorry, but Satanic Ritual Abuse has not been thoroughly debunked for me. It has been mocked; the topic has been shut down; it has been banned from conversation, but it hasn’t been debunked.
It’s amazing to watch the media in action on the subject of pedophilia: If it’s a priest, he’s automatically guilty. If it’s a teacher, well, “Kids are more sophisticated these days.” If it’s a Satanist: “False memory syndrome!”
“1. Am I the last to notice?
As a cadet at Texas A&M circa 1968, presidential candidate RICK PERRY looks eerily like ROTC rage-aholic (and future fragging victim) “Neidermeyer” from Animal House”
Un, no. And I am not amused. Get this crap outta here.
This is the Lifestyle section and you’re not being forced to read it.
If you don’t like it, just remain on the other side of the curtain where the wholesome videos are kept.
Tolbert, exactly which sections am I forced to read, I’m a newbie leftist drone and nobody has sent me the manual yet, oh sorry the ironing was missed, yes she meant that as a preump to the obvious lefty snide non-partisan humerous (sic) remarks.
hey five feet Love to see your wit on a much broader (and less litiguounsohumanrightsttribunaly… oh you get the get) forum. Oh and you might want to explain why you (yes you) are from the alleged heart of Canadian socialism (Tommy Douglas the greatest Canadian, just ask the CBC)even though 99% of Canadian socialists now live in other provinces (the one’s with crappy economies, although just a coincidence I’m told).
You are only forced to read what you decide to read. If you don’t then care for what you have read, please, feel free to comment on the content. But trying to get them thrown off or removed is tantamount to censorship. We can’t have that now can we?
Doesn’t this drive-by “dross” belong on SNL? Who’s up next, Piper Palin?
Lifestyle? Sneering at Perry because he was once a member of the Corp of Cadets? Since when is “lifestyle” about cheap, jeering putdowns of Republican candidates?
As for my opinion on this juvenile piece, you don’t have to read it, twink.
Heh!
Scratch an Neidermyer find an Aggie. What years were you in the Corps Doc? Hitting a little to close to home for you?
Hey, Doc,
A sense of humor. Get one.
Kathy, it’s nice to see you on Pajamas Media. And I’ll check with you next week. Believe me, you’re much better than Gossip Cop or Radar…
Welcome Kathy.
Broad with a 20 gauge & low brow taste? I think you’ll fit in fine here.
I smell another moral panic, a la “satanic ritual abuse.”
I smell another big denial like the one involving those silly rumors of Rock Hudson being gay.
BTW, saying a young clean-cut guy in a cadet uniform looks like a horse’s arse just because he is a young clean-cut guy in a cadet uniform, is lame.
Exactly. The day Rick Perry had that picture taken was probably one of the proudest of his young life. He’s earned his Senior boots — a VERY big deal in Aggieland, home of the Texas A&M Corps of Cadets.
Check this out, Kathy, if you want to understand the context of the photo you decided to have a bit of cool-kid, liberal fun with: http://corps.tamu.edu/
Funny to see Ace (Adam Carolla) show up on PJM. Adam’s podcast with Roger Simon is how I heard of PJM.
BTW, the Car Show is awesome. It is much better than the US version of Top Gear.
If I compared a picture of Obama to Erkel, it would say more about me than it would about Obama. Just say’n.
The Hollywood rumor for decades is that Corey Feldman gets $10k a month for life from Michael Jackson. That is who Corey is talking about but he can’t name names or his money goes away.
You are not alone, the moment I saw those pictures of Perry in his college “costume” I thought “my god thats the embodiment of Neidemeyer”.
This is not coincidence, or cause to laugh at great old films, this my friends is cause to sound the alarm, the likes of Rick Perry have been lambasted in the arts forever, it is we the public that tend to laugh at what is TRULY SCARY. STOP HIM!!!
To steal some advice from another great movie – “Lighten up, Francis”
Personally, I think the Neidermeyer/Perry reference is pretty funny. Then again, I spent 4 years at the ‘Blue Zoo’ (aka the Rocky Mountain Monastery aka US Air Force Academy), and we always brought out the ‘Neidermeyer’ jokes at the drop of a hat. Hell, I’m willing to bet that just about every Aggie with a twisted sense of humor went to a Halloween party dressed as Douglas C. Neidermeyer at some point in their life. Unless they had a broomstick stuck up their ass, in which case they were called ‘Neidermeyer’ behind their back 365 days a year by the other Hitler Youth from College Station (just kidding on that last bit, the Air Force did a much better job making us look like fresh new members of the Waffen SS with the dark blue trench coats and wheel caps….)
Military humor (the genuine article, not that weak-ass shit you see in Reader’s Digest) requires a thick hide. Definitely something I’ll miss when I retire this spring…