Before we get to today's What in the Actual Hell? story, I have to give you some background. I promise to keep it as light and breezy as possible, in that classic VodkaPundit style.
"The Parties agree that an armed attack against one or more of them in Europe or North America shall be considered an attack against them all," is the opening line of NATO's famous Article 5, calling upon every member to go to war should any of them be attacked.
Kids these days aren't exactly spouting treaty text and, come to think of it, kids back in my day weren't doing that either. Because we were kids. With kid lives. We had bikes to ride, PBJs to eat, teachers to taunt. But if you were to ask a reasonably well-informed adult about the North Atlantic Treaty's Article 5, they might remember the gist of it. It got a lot of play during the Bad Old Days of the Cold War, again after 9/11 — the only time Article 5 has ever been invoked — and lately these last couple of years as Finland, Sweden, and (in vain) Ukraine have all applied for membership.
Article 5 was written carefully, specifying in 1949 that a member had to be attacked in Europe or in North America because Washington wanted to make it clear that the US wouldn't be going to war to protect British or French colonial possessions in Africa or Asia.
"Sure, we'll be there if Russia's 8th Guards Army makes a dash for Frankfurt through the Fulda Gap, but you're on your own in Vietnam."
OK, so sometimes things don't work out exactly as planned. But for 75 years — and our war in Vietnam wasn't a NATO operation, despite my mild teasing — NATO has provided mutual protection to its members on both sides of the North Atlantic.
The reason I remind you of all this is because of Argentina's awesome new libertarian-minded president, Javier Milei. He's been in Boss Mode since he assumed office late last year, bringing inflation down almost at once (!), firing 70,000 government workers (!!), and balancing the country's budget in one month (!!!).
Could we borrow Milei for a bit? Pretty please?
Now Milei says he wants a partnership with NATO. You know, the organization for Europe and North America, both places where Argentina isn't.
I don't think Milei means to commit Argentine troops to Europe's defense. If memory serves, Argentina once had some trouble committing troops just to the nearby Falkland Islands. But what he does desire is a partnership with NATO. Defense Minister Luis Alfonso Petri submitted a formal request on Thursday and announced, "I met with Deputy Secretary General of NATO Geoana. I transmitted a letter of intent to him, which contains a request from Argentina to become a global partner of this organization."
Believe it or not, there's precedent for Argentina's request. During President Donald Trump's first term, Colombia asked for and received NATO partnership status. As partners (but not official allies), NATO and Colombia work together on "cyber security, terrorism, the fight against corruption and maritime security. Colombia provides demining training to NATO Allies and partner countries, while NATO is also supporting Colombia in its continuing efforts to develop its armed forces."
Those are all things Milei would like for Argentina as he pushes his country to become, like it was in the past, much more Western-oriented.
And before you ask, the British Foreign Office said today, "On the Falkland Islands, the Foreign Secretary and President Milei said they would agree to disagree, and do so politely."
As partners should.
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