"Why Are These People Running for President?"

Kurt Schlichter runs down the list of pre-failed GOP 2016 contenders, and my favorite bit is about my two least-favorite candidates:

How about Mike Huckabee, soon to be played by Sorrell Booke in the upcoming film “Elmer Gantry: The Revenge”? In a time when the GOP base is maneuvering to fight the overreaching metastasization of government, Huckabee is embraces the bloat. He doesn’t object to big government; just wants to use government to impose his own weird populist authoritarianism. Don’t count on him to repeal Obamacare – he’ll expand it to cover that snake oil “diabetes cure” he peddled to the same slack-jawed head-nodders he hopes will vote for him. Go away, Huckabee, and take your stupid bass with you.

Let’s not forget Rick Santorum. Apparently, the GOP desperately needs a failed ex-senator who couldn’t win reelection in 2006 and has spent the last decade modeling sweaters and railing against sodomy. He probably doesn’t like rum either, though I expect he’s open to the lash.

Ouch.

Read the whole thing.