West Coast, Messed Coast™ Update: Ban Assault Hammers

Townhall Media

Greetings to the West Coast, Messed Coast™ report following Twitter Freedom Day.

When I joined Twitter in February 2009, the platform was a freewheeling rhetorical playground. Then came the Left’s Reign of Terror where wrong-think would be punished. Canceled accounts stacked up like cordwood. People were fired from jobs for offending blue checks on Twitter. The Left kept stats on their Twitter sacks.


Before Twitter undertook its political censorship, an offended person would be subjected to ridicule for being a wussified wimp. Then conservative takes were put in the Twitter lockbox. Now under Elon Musk, we hope there are no more safe spaces for these Jacobins. Cowboy up, Lefties: being offended is no longer a reason for someone to sack your account anymore.

That’s the hope anyway.

Ban Assault Hammers

We go from Silicon Valley a few miles away to San Francisco in our West Coast, Messed Coast™ tour to bring you this update on the hammer attack on Nancy Pelosi’s husband Paul. It is here where criminals are almost the only people allowed to carry guns.

The House Speaker’s husband underwent surgery for a cracked skull after he was attacked by a man with a hammer in the couple’s plush San Francisco manse in the wee hours of Friday. Nancy was in the couple’s other manse in Washington, D.C. The good news is that he’s expected to make a full recovery, according to early reports.

Now the bad news. The house reportedly was outfitted with a video recording security system and had special guards, including Nancy Pelosi’s own Capitol Police, but Nancy doesn’t want it shown to the media because they’d like “privacy at this time.”

Crime is out of control all along the West Coast, Messed Coast™, especially in San Francisco where no cop is defunded enough and where prosecutors are more like defense attorneys. But Nancy, naturally, has her own police at the ready.


San Francisco area attorney Harmeet Dhillon said that there’s heavy security coverage around the Pelosi mansion. She would know because she served Paul Pelosi with a lawsuit there.

“We have been to many social events in the immediate vicinity as well,” she said in a follow-up tweet. “There are security cameras everywhere, and many homes have private security.”

Giving special condolences was Sen. Rand Paul (R-Ky.), whom the Left had attacked three times: on the baseball field by a Bernie Sanders and Rachel Maddow fan, by a crazed Democrat neighbor when he was put in the hospital with broken ribs, and by Antifa “mostly peaceful protesters” after a Trump event in D.C.

Godspeed in your recovery Mr. Pelosi.

And wait for San Franciscans to call for a ban on Assault Hammers.

Recommended: Behold the Democrats’ Closing Argument for the 2022 Midterm Election

Oregon Ready to Shoot Selves in Foot

In Oregon, voters seem poised to pass the most restrictive gun laws in the nation (we’re number one!) and create what is tantamount to a gun registry. But don’t worry, the state police, who slow-roll permits with impunity, will never, never, ever abuse its access to the information. They promise.

Portland’s general crime rate has skyrocketed, and the murder rate has doubled since the Antifa and Black Lives Matter riots convinced mayors everywhere that they were racist if they didn’t cut police funding. And defund they did. As a result, more people were murdered, raped, and had their homes cleaned out by gun-toting thugs. And Oregonians’ ability to defend themselves has further declined with woke DAs and woke hack judges that are selected, not elected.

And now the backers of this measure — basically Salem Democrat insiders — don’t want Oregonians to defend themselves at all unless it’s with a hammer.

Ballot Measure 114 would ban “large capacity” magazines (normal-sized magazines for most guns), require permits to purchase a firearm, require the serfs to go to state-approved training by law enforcement before they’re allowed to buy a gun, and only receive training at state-sanctioned, state-approved gun ranges, which don’t exist on a wide scale. Good luck getting a class.

And girls, if you’ve got a stalker right now, good luck getting a permit to get a gun, getting trained before you get a gun, and — oh, sorry, you’re dead.


Oregon is willing to spend other people’s money and waste other people’s time to litigate a patently unconstitutional case, both at the state and federal levels.

Plastic Straw Politics

Nike co-founder Phil Knight wrote a memoir several years ago called Shoe Dog, in which he chronicles his quintessential Portland upbringing, his tour in the Army, years as a runner at the University of Oregon, teaching at Portland State College, and the difficulty of starting a company from nothing. His story covers all four corners of the Beaver State. He bleeds the yellow and green of UO. He loves the West Coast, Messed Coast™.

And he’s sick of what Democrats have done to the home he loves.

This election cycle, the 84-year-old billionaire has combined his money with the know-how of former Oregon Congressman Greg Walden in a political action committee to “bring balance back to Salem.”

Knight told The New York Times that understanding Oregon politics is as simple as a political cartoon he saw recently. “One of the political cartoons after our legislative session had a person snorting cocaine out of a mountain of white,” he told The Times “It said, ‘which of these is illegal in Oregon?’ The answer was the plastic straw.”

For Our VIPs: Would You Want John Fetterman Driving Your Kid’s School Bus?

He’s giving his money to the Republicans.

Wokism is a social contagion.

Vote Tiffany, Save Lives

Democrats are terrified that the ossified piece of Washington, D.C., furniture, Patty Murray, will lose her senate seat on November 8 to veterans’ activist Tiffany Smiley, a Republican.

The most recent Survey USA poll shows Murray with a commanding eight-point lead. Somehow Patty Murray doesn’t believe it.

Indeed, the Democrats’ favorite political action committees don’t believe it, either, having poured millions more in the race Murray should easily win. Indeed, Murray represents a state that has liberal abortion laws. Pro-abortion groups want Murray to help pass legislation to deny other states the ability to vote for more restrictions on abortion.

And now you can say that on Twitter and not be censored.

Ah, feels good.

Until our next West Coast, Messed Coast™ update.


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