The PJ Tatler

Remember That 'Hilarious' South Park Episode Where Christopher Reeve Eats an Aborted Baby?

What if baby parts could cure… malnutrition?

This week on The Five, Greg Gutfeld has been at his brilliant, acerbic best while skewering Planned Parenthood and its ghoulish defenders.  But he has gone farther than just the baby-parts issue to the core of the life debate.

Gutfeld’s best point: To Planned Parenthood babies are garbage, but baby parts are precious.

This just about drove Juan Williams over the edge, and he started shouting, which he always does when he has no point to make (and maybe doesn’t believe the point he is making), and deflecting by saying  “this has become political!” (ditto).

“It’s not a baby, it’s fetal tissue!”

Juan pulled out the medical research talking point, trying to get all weepy and listing diseases that are supposedly cured by fetal-tissue research, even though Dana Perino has been pointing all week to this excellent Federalist article on why the same research can be done without chopping up babies.

To which Greg challenged a stunned and stuttering Juan, “What if they suffer from malnutrition?  Perhaps they should eat the baby!”

Juan was shocked at the suggestion, acting bewildered; Kimberly Guilfoyle patiently tried to explain it to him before giving up in a rare display of personal disgust.

Despite having stumped the band a few times with cultural references in this show, Greg seemed to forget that his subconscious probably dredged up the classically fearless South Park episode “Krazy Kripples” from 2003, in which Christopher Reeve literally eats aborted babies in order to regain his legs.

Reeve became the poster boy for fetal medical research in the early part of the millennium, following his 1995 horseback riding accident that left him a quadriplegic.

Reeve, whose wooden acting basically was no more animated before the accident than after (and whose career had basically floundered for over a decade since Superman), found himself in the limelight again.  He was the cause célèbre that the Left pulled out at every opportunity and gave Courage Awards to. They used him to bash conservatives who valued life over the head as science-denying uncaring Neanderthals.

And he so relished the role that it makes the South Park episode absolutely defensible—and almost tame in light of recent revelations.

Medical research has long been the liberal trump card in the life issue.  Ten years ago, the mainstream media made it the dividing point between normal pro-lifers and unreasonable fanatics.  Michael Reagan, Orrin Hatch and Trent Lott were among those who caved in to curry (about 5 seconds of) favor.

John Kerry spent a fair amount of time in 2007-2008 flogging the issue, culminating in a classic bit of John Edwards demagoguery: “When John Kerry is president, people like Christopher Reeve will get up outta that wheelchair and walk again!”

Not exactly.

Now, nearly a decade later, we see the result of that campaign.  Not one medical advancement, but lots of excuses to fund the Left’s political machine in a literally heart-rending fashion.

P.S.  Some day, I hope to meet the actor who stood and controlled himself while a Planned Parenthood Mengele-ette stirred through a dish of body parts and brightly said things like, “Here’s another boy.”  Not jumping across the table and choking the life out of her shows far more self control than I will ever possess—even if it meant getting up out of my future wheelchair to walk.