The PJ Tatler

Cops Investigate Report of Two Seven Year Olds Kissing at School

The tipping point for the downfall of our civilization is near.

Police in Manatee County, Florida, were called to investigate a report that two seven-year-old kids were kissing at school — on the lips!

Florida police last week investigated whether a kiss exchanged by seven-year-old elementary students amounted to “lewd and lascivious” behavior, according to an incident report.

Responding to “allegations” that the children kissed “on the lips” during class last Tuesday, a Manatee County Sheriff’s Office deputy was dispatched to the school to investigate, according to the report, which includes a charge description as “unnatural and lascivious.”

The report, which contains redactions, does not indicate the source of the kissing “allegations.”

Deputy April Culbreath reported speaking with a teacher who “witnessed the incident.” Thereafter, Culbreath concluded that there was “no indication that there was anything sexual about this incident” and no evidence that Florida state law had been violated.

Well, I’ll bet those kids will think twice before they kiss anyone again.

Is it a requirement for teachers at American schools to be mentally unbalanced? Or are teachers just totally besotted with fear that the children in their charge might grow up without their help?

There is a mindlessness to much of what is going on in schools that is directly related to the idea that unless the school is in total control of everything kids do, they are failing. The mania for organized activities, the panic when a kid fashions a gun out of a Pop Tart, suspending a kid because he got a “soldier’s haircut” or shaved their head to show solidarity with a classmate who had cancer — and these are incidents that have made it on the news. How many hundreds or thousands of similar demonstrations of stupidity have gone on around the country that didn’t receive any press attention?

I’ve always thought homeschooling was a great idea. After hearing this story, I’m more convinced than ever before.