“I am telling you, these countries are calling us up, kissing my a**. They are dying to make a deal: ‘Please, please sir, make a deal. I’ll do anything! I’ll do anything, sir.’”
—Donald Trump, April 2025
The video is fun, too:
Early feedback on the newly-signed U.S.-EU trade deal is overwhelmingly pro-Trump. A BBC analysis with the title “Who are the winners and losers in the US-EU trade deal?” gave a very clear consensus:
French Prime Minister Francois Bayrou commented: "It is a dark day when an alliance of free peoples, brought together to affirm their common values and to defend their common interests, resigns itself to submission."
He was joined by at least two other French government ministers as well as Viktor Orban, the Hungarian leader, who said that Trump "ate von der Leyen for breakfast". [emphasis added]
The person Orban is referencing is Ursula von der Leyen, the president of the European Commission. She’s a German politician who pushed for the Nord Stream 2 pipeline that not-so-cleverly placed Germany’s energy security in the hands of Putin. She also advocated for a 40% quota for women on German corporate boards.
Yup, that’s who the Europeans sent to negotiate against Trump. According to Orban, Trump swallowed her whole.
Of course, if this truly was a one-sided trade deal, you’d expect the losing side to kvetch, whine, and moan. That’s what the house media is supposed to do when you’ve been beaten, pummeled, and humiliated worldwide for decades at a time. (Trust me, I know EXACTLY what I’m talking about: I’m a Dallas Cowboys fan, and I read the flippin’ newspaper. But don’t worry: 2025 will totally be our year.)
Still, you’d also expect the hometown media on the winner’s side to be at least somewhat celebratory. Because, at the end of the day, we’re all Americans… right? No matter your political persuasion, anything that helps the American people achieve peace and prosperity has gotta be good.
…Right?!
Wrong. You could almost hear the gnashing of teeth:
The Washington Post: To avoid worst of Trump tariffs, E.U. accepted a lopsided deal
The New York Times: Europe, Worried by Other Global Crises, Agrees to Trump’s Trade Deal
Bloomberg: EU Reaches Tariff Deal With US to Avert Painful Trade Blow
The Economist: Europe averts its Trumpian trade nightmare
Yahoo Finance: Analysis: Out-gunned Europe accepts least-worst US trade deal
The U.S.-EU trade deal validated what Trump predicted all along: The U.S. marketplace is — by a wide margin — the crown jewel of global capitalism, but our leaders had devalued it via dopey, destructive, one-sided trade deals that disadvantaged American workers. Simply by leveraging American power (hard and soft), we could quickly extract favorable concessions that boost the U.S. economy, level the playing field, open foreign markets, and enrich American businesses.
Boom: He did it. Trump really, truly did it! Yet another promise made, promise kept.
Prashant Newnaha, the senior Asia-Pacific rates strategist for TD Securities in Singapore, said, “A 15% tariff on European goods, forced purchase of U.S. energy and military equipment and zero tariff retaliation by Europe, that’s not negotiation, that’s the art of the deal. A big win for the U.S.”
Only a leftwing, unenlightened luddite would feign shock over this outcome. For 50 years, Trump outmaneuvered and out-negotiated New York city political thugs (mostly on the left, but sometimes on the right), the Manhattan mafia, corrupt contractors, labor unions, dishonest bureaucrats, international bankers, and TV executives. Then, over the past decade, he’s fought the Democratic Party, the media-industrial cabal, and Deep State troublemakers — culminating with his landslide victory in the 2024 Electoral College. He’s not just battle-tested; he’s battle-hardened.
When you look at it like that, Ursula von der Leyen never stood a chance!
Meanwhile, American liberals had deluded themselves with torrid tales of TACO: Trump Always Chickens Out. (Yeah, right. Ask Iran about Trump chickening out.) According to the sweet little lies they share on Bluesky and other “safe spaces,” Trump is a doofus, a buffoon who can’t do anything right.
(Other than, y’know, kicking their a**es on Election Day. Over and over again.)
Now, they’ve gotta come to terms with another yuuuge Trump victory, and they don’t like it one bit. Even though they are, technically speaking, still kinda/sorta Americans, too.
Their salty crocodile tears are delicious:
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