There are few people in Hollywood I can say I truly respect, but Jay Leno is one of them. Growing up watching him on TV, I always liked the fact that he wasn't overly partisan or political and happily poked fun at both sides. His interviews were good, and he didn't kiss up to his guests.
Off the screen, he's always come across as a decent and compassionate human being who doesn't shy away from helping others in need. He's also patriotic and a big supporter of the United States military and veterans. Earlier this year, I wrote about how he was literally bringing and serving food—not just paying someone to do it—to the firefighters and other first responders who were battling the fires in Southern California.
This week, Leno is making headlines for another reason that somehow both broke and warmed my heart.
The comedian, who turns 75 next week, has been married to his wife, Mavis, since 1980. While she has managed to stay out of the spotlight, Leno has always spoken favorably of his wife, who is 78. The couple never had children, and I do not know a lot about her, but I know she has dedicated much of her life to helping others, specifically women and young girls suffering from terrible oppression in Afghanistan. From what I've heard through the grapevine, like her husband, she doesn't just talk the talk; she's dedicated much of her own time and resources to this cause and others.
Unfortunately, Mrs. Leno suffers from "advanced dementia" now. Last year, her husband filed a petition for conservatorship, citing her doctor's letter that explained she sometimes didn't recognize Jay or know her own date of birth and had "been progressively losing capacity and orientation to space and time for several years." Her lawyer agreed with the idea, citing that she receives "excellent care" from her husband. Shortly after, the couple made a public appearance at the premiere for Jerry Seinfeld's "Unfrosted" movie.
"This is exactly what America needs right now," Jay Leno and Jerry Seinfeld share a moment on the #Unfrosted carpet pic.twitter.com/WTtnJsulBo
— The Hollywood Reporter (@THR) May 1, 2024
At the time, Mavis said she "felt great," and Jay said they just wanted to get out and do something fun and non-serious because everything was so serious these days.
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On Wednesday, Leno appeared on the "In Depth with Graham Bensinger" podcast and, in a rare moment, he spoke out about his wife's condition, their marriage, and what being her primary caregiver means to him. He agreed that taking care of her is a challenge, but there's no other place he'd rather be.
"I have never been particularly challenged. I was not in the Army. I didn’t have to shoot anybody. I didn't have to risk my life. When you get married, you take a vow—will I live up to this? Or will I be like a sleazy guy, if something happens to my wife, I’m out banging the cashier at the mini-mart?" he said, also adding, "At some point in my life, I’m going to be called upon to defend myself, stand up, whatever it might be. I think that’s really what defines a marriage. That’s really what love is. That’s what you do. I’m glad I didn't cut and run, I’m glad I didn’t run off with some woman half my age or any of that silly nonsense. I would rather be with her than doing something else."
Leno said that his wife has always been very independent, and he enjoys feeling needed now. He likes being there for her and taking care of her. "When you have to feed someone and change them, carry them to the bathroom, and do that kind of stuff every day, it’s a challenge. And it’s not that I enjoy doing it, but I guess I enjoy doing it," he said.
He also said that he loves her now more than ever. "We’ve been married 45 years. The first 40 — unbelievable. The last five have been challenging, put it that way. I think there’s more love now. Because, why am I doing this? You know? Well, this is why." Leno also told Besinger, "I married the person that had the ideals I wish I had."
Leno said he tries to find humor in everyday things and even uses flashcards to help his wife with her memory.
Earlier this year, he told People magazine something similar. "You try to find the humor in this situation. I took my wife shopping, I can see she's a little down, [so I said], 'Come on, we'll go to the mall.' So we go to Nordstrom's and I said, 'You see anything you like?' 'No, no.' So we look at the shoes, and [she says], 'Oh, I like these sneakers."
Those sneakers were bright blue and cost $24. They seemed to make Mavis happy, so he suggested she pick up another pair. When they got to the register, the cashier told him his total was $847.
He continued the story. "I go, 'No, I only had two pairs of sneakers. I thought these were $24.' [The cashier] goes, 'Yeah, these are $24. But the other ones were [designer sneakers]. It looked like the guy took a pair of the same sneakers and used a Bedazzler on them, and they were $800. I look at my wife and said, 'You like these?' I go, 'Honey, you look great.'"
Leno added, "It's fine, I'm glad I can afford this, and it made my wife happy. It just made me laugh. Just typical — I thought the $24 pair looked better than those, but that's okay. It just made me laugh, and I think when you're dealing with this kind of thing, you find your moments where you can have a laugh and have fun, and my wife really likes them and felt good about it."
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