Roger L. Simon

Saturday Night Live in the Palestinian Territories

I’m in a hotel room in New York and the Middle East seems strangely near. And I don’t think it’s just the 3000 miles LA – NY difference. You can almost hear that land of Palestine imploding. Things have spun so far out of control it’s hard to imagine what will happen. And in the midst of it all, somewhere in that benighted land some Hamas lunatic has run off with Yasser Arafat’s Nobel Peace Prize – a joke on a joke. I wonder what the pompous fakes in Oslo who awarded the psycho-killler the prize in the first place must be thinking. I’ll tell you what I’m thinking – it’s poetic justice. With luck the silly medal will end up melted down for BBs in some Jenin basement.

Meanwhile Debka says Hamas walked off with the intelligence haul of intelligence hauls, rifling Fatah. If Debka is right, it would seem that the one-time Holocaust denier Abbas was a CIA agent. If he was one, he stank. And since, it’s Debka, I’m skeptical anyway. But what I’m not entirely skeptical about is the report from the Times Online that newly-installed Defense Minister Ehud Barak is lining up 20000 troops to say sayonara to Hamas. I’m not entirely skeptical because Ehud Barak has demonstrated something in his past that Ehud Olmert never has – balls – even if he demonstrated them dressed as a woman. It’s going to be an interesting summer.