Congratulations, a Man Just Won Miss Netherlands

What a time to be alive! The Miss Netherlands pageant has taken a rather unexpected turn, ladies and gentlemen. This year, the crown goes to… a trans woman — Rikkie Valeria Kolle. You heard that right, a person who was “assigned male” at birth but now “identifies and presents” as a woman. This quite literally adds a whole new dimension to the beauty pageant scene. Who needs historical gender norms when we can just rewrite them, right?

A man just won “Miss Netherlands” 2023.

Considering the fact that we live in a post-Truth world, I wasn’t even expecting anything else. It’s all so predictable and unoriginal at this point. pic.twitter.com/j6NKo2cCvu

— Eva Vlaardingerbroek (@EvaVlaar) July 9, 2023

Ladies, you might want to take notes. Apparently, you have been doing womanhood wrong this whole time. And those who are able to teach you this little fact are… men. Sports were the first frontier, and now beauty pageants are following suit. No traditionally feminine territory is off-limits.

The news has left the Netherlands reeling, with the full gamut of emotions on display. There’s shock and outrage, but humor too, because if you can’t laugh at something this ludicrous, what can you do?

Many Dutch women have found a way to voice their concern: selfies. Our Twitter feeds are inundated with photos of women along with the hashtag #ikbeneenvrouw (#iamawoman). It’s a powerful message, a reminder that biology, in fact, does matter. Not to those in charge of every cultural institution, of course, but to normal people.

News program presenter Raisa Blommestijn, ever the outspoken critic, has penned a scathing rebuke of the situation. Translated from Dutch, she wrote, “A man has become Miss Netherlands 2023. Disgusting. The message is that men are better at being women than women themselves, that men are more beautiful than women. Under the guise of progress, women are being erased. But we will not let that happen.”

Een man is Miss Netherlands 2023 geworden. Walgelijk. De boodschap is dat mannen beter zijn in vrouw-zijn dan vrouwen zelf, dat mannen mooier zijn dan vrouwen. Onder het mom van progressie worden vrouwen uitgegumd. Maar dat laten we niet gebeuren.

Deel: #ikbeneenvrouw pic.twitter.com/euCp5olbFM

— Raisa Blommestijn (@rblommestijn) July 9, 2023

Then there’s Jan Roos, an opinion maker and host of the popular gossip program Roddelpraat. He opted for a humorous take, saying, “As a woman, you’d better not participate in Miss competitions these days. Apparently, men are better at this, too.”

It’s true. Obviously. You women think you’re beautiful and special. Well, yes. But only until we men decide we want to be beautiful and wear make-up, dresses and high heels too. Once we do, you women can’t hold a candle to us. Note, I’m not the one saying it. Oh no, the experts from the Miss Netherlands pageant say so. If anyone should know, it’s them. Right?

Now that we men have conquered this beauty pageant thing, let’s look for more women-dominated spaces we can take over. Maybe soon enough we’ll teach you women the finer points of childbirth, or we’ll offer to take over for you during your menstrual cycles. The possibilities are endless in our brave new world. Don’t you just love progress?