News & Politics

President Biden, the 1980s Are Now Calling to Ask for Their Foreign Policy Back

Image from tweeted video.

Back before Joe Biden’s old boss Barack Obama fulfilled his lifelong dream of producing TV shows and getting to meet Bruce Springsteen, one of Obama’s stepping-stone jobs was serving as president of the United States. He wasn’t very good at it, and he lied about everybody who pointed out why he wasn’t very good at it, but every once in a while he’d say something amusing. Here’s one of the more amusing things he said:

“Governor Romney, I’m glad that you recognize that Al Qaeda is a threat. Because a few months ago, when you were asked what’s the biggest geopolitical threat facing America, you said Russia. Not Al Qaeda. You said Russia. And the 1980s are now calling to ask for their foreign policy back. Because, y’know, the Cold War has been over for 20 years.”

And then he sort of ran out of steam and stumbled over the rest of his rehearsed talking points because he didn’t have a teleprompter.

That’s one of my favorite Obama clips because it perfectly captures two of his most defining traits: sneering condescension and a complete disregard for facts. Obama was and is wrong about most things, but he was spectacularly wrong about Russia. So wrong, in fact, that now the party he used to lead always blames Russia for every single thing that goes wrong in America. Not only did the Cold War never end, but now it’s positively freezing. And that quote will live on forever, proving Obama was dumb.

And speaking of Dumb, let’s not forget his pal Dumber. Joe Biden also dunked on Romney for being right about Russia:

It’s doubtful that ol’ Joe remembers saying any of that. He can’t even remember which flavor of Ensure he had for breakfast. But if he does remember it, he hopes you don’t. Because now the Democrat party line on Russia is much, much different:

“[Putin] will pay a price. We had a long talk, he and I. I know him relatively well. The conversation started off, I said, ‘I know you and you know me. If I established this occurred, then be prepared…’ President Bush had said, ‘I looked in his eyes and saw a soul.’ I said, ‘I looked in your eyes and I don’t think you have a soul.’ [Putin] looked back at me and said, ‘We understand each other…’ The price he’s gonna pay, well, you’ll see shortly. I’m not gonna, there’s, by the way. We oughta be able that old, that trite expression ‘walk and chew gum at the same time.’ There are places where it’s in our mutual interest to work together. That’s why I renewed the START agreement with him. That occurred while he’s doing this. But that’s overwhelmingly in the interest of humanity, that we diminish the prospect of a nuclear exchange.”

I’m not sure why Joe Biden just brought up, unprompted, the prospect of a nuclear exchange with Russia, but I guess that’s to remind us that Putin is a killer. And somehow that doesn’t contradict the Obama administration’s assertion that Putin was completely harmless and Romney was crazy to say otherwise. As with most things in politics, it makes sense when you don’t think about it.

“If I established this occurred, then be prepared…” Yeah, no idea what that means. Biden’s mind, never the sturdiest of structures, is rapidly collapsing.

Then there’s this: “The price [Putin] is gonna pay, well, you’ll see shortly.” What does that mean? What price is Putin going to pay for whatever it is Biden thinks he did? And what does Biden think Putin did? And does Biden actually think?

I’d rather not die in a nuclear war because Joe Biden thinks Vladimir Putin is hiding under the bed, a full decade after Biden told us Russia was old news. His folksy brand of bovine feces was sorta funny when he didn’t really have any power, but now I’m trying to see the bright side of President Kamala.

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