News & Politics

Comrade Michael Moore Attended Glorious Russia-Backed Anti-Trump Rally

Michael Moore participates in the "We Stand United: New York Rally to Protect Shared Values" on Thursday, Jan.19, 2017, in New York. (Photo by Greg Allen/Invision/AP)

If you’re like me, then first things first: my condolences. That’s terrible. Nobody should be so cursed. But if you are unfortunate enough to be like me, then you’ve tuned out most of the “Russia” stuff we hear every single day from our moral, ethical, and intellectual betters in the press.

Did Trump collude with the Russians to throw the 2016 election? It’s not outside the realm of possibility, I guess. Trump and Putin do seem to share a special bond. But you’d think that after a solid year of investigation, by now the Dems would have more to show for themselves than, “Well, it could happen. You don’t know.”

Every time there’s a huge Russia bombshell, it turns out to be a big yawn. It’s boring. She lost. Get over it.

And I really don’t feel like being lectured about Russia by the same people who pointed and laughed at Mitt Romney when he said Russia was a problem. Remember this?

I didn’t trust Russia then, and I don’t trust Russia now. I’m glad the Dems finally wised up, even if they only started caring after Hillary failed.

And that’s what makes the following item extra tasty. Gregg Re, Fox News:

Michael Moore, the polemical filmmaker who has long accused President Trump of colluding with Russians, posted videos and pictures of himself participating in a protest in Manhattan that was allegedly organized by Russians in November 2016.

Prosecutors said Friday that the Russians indicted for meddling in the presidential campaign were also behind anti-Trump rallies that occured after the election.

That’s right, Robert Mueller is now saying that the post-election “Trump Is NOT My President” rally outside Trump Tower was organized by the Russkies. And Donald Trump’s biggest critic (literally!) was front and center:

Ебена мать!

This would be humiliating for Moore, if only he were capable of shame. Just look at all those useful idiots, doing exactly what their Russian masters wanted them to do.

But how could Comrade Moore and all his fellow travelers be complicit if they didn’t know whose orders they were following? Aren’t they just dupes? Aren’t they the real victims here?

Nope. It doesn’t matter if they knew who they were helping. Just ask the guy who took down Nixon:

Witting. Unwitting. Whatever.

Back in the old days, a conspiracy required conspirators. In order to conspire, you had to know you were conspiring. But not anymore! Now it doesn’t matter whether or not you know you’re a pawn of the Russians. It doesn’t matter if you intend to do exactly what they want you to do. It’s collusion, whether you know you’re colluding or not.

No more pizza and hot dogs for you, Michael Moore. It’s all bubliks and borscht from now on!

In other news about lefties who are too stupid to know they’re helping their enemies, here’s what’s being reported over at “News”week:

That’s right. It’s not Al Franken’s fault that he was accused of groping numerous women. It’s not the fault of all his fellow Democrats who called on him to step down. It’s the alt-right’s fault. They’re the brilliant masterminds who pulled the strings. So says Nina “Presidential Kneepads” Burleigh.

No wonder “News”week was sold for one dollar. Keep the change!