'Central Park Karen' Faces Jail Time for Making a False Report. Now Do James Comey.

AP Photo/Frank Franklin II, File

The case of Central Park Karen is legendary by now. Amy Cooper was caught on film walking her dog off-leash by a man claiming to be a birdwatcher in New York’s Central Park. They both antagonized each other and she lied about the danger he posed while he was being unnecessarily aggressive. Because Cooper called 911 and lied to the dispatcher, she was arrested and is being charged with falsifying a police report, and rightly so. People who do this should face consequences. The problem is the unequal application of justice when it comes to filing false reports. If I were Cooper’s lawyer, my defense would be, “Why should she go to jail for this when others do not?” (Does Jussie Smollett ring any bells?)


Anyone who has had child welfare come to their home on a malicious anonymous tip—which landed them in court for years while they tried to recover their children from an overzealous system—wishes they had a right to face their accuser and see that person punished for telling lies. That would be groovy. But it doesn’t happen. Child abuse “tipsters” and social workers are protected from prosecution even when they tell egregious lies, unlike Central Park Karen, who had the book thrown at her.

You know who else allegedly falsified official documents and tried to pass them off as matters of immense national security to a court and got caught illegally spying on a presidential candidate for a political party? James Comey. But he hasn’t been arrested like Central Park Karen. Faux FISA Comey is living large, writing books, getting interviews, and tweeting about the woke NBA. What a life this guy leads!

He’s also shilling for Biden because, principles.

It would be funny if it weren’t so downright insulting and deeply unjust. Amy Cooper broke a law and she’s going to get up to a year in jail for it. Not even the birdwatcher thinks she should be prosecuted, because he suffered no damage. But the state was damaged by using police resources for a lie. How much more so has our Republic been damaged by the use of resources and treasure as a result of the lies that James Comey’s FBI told? There were 17 falsifications on the FISA warrants to spy on Carter Page. They destroyed a man’s life. They bankrupted a family. These were innocent people. And we paid for it. How many millions of dollars were sunk into “Russia Russia Russia!” over the FBI’s FISA scam? It reportedly cost us $32 million big ones to get this conclusion of a three-year nightmare.


“The Special Counsel’s investigation did not find that the Trump campaign or anyone associated with it conspired or coordinated with Russia in its efforts to influence the 2016 US presidential election.”

Unlike the birdwatcher, who has never claimed he was harmed, Carter Page wrote an entire book about the immense harm the false investigation into him did to his life. Where’s his five-page apology from Rolling Stone for running this piece of absolute garbage insinuating Page was a Russian asset when it turned out he was a CIA informant above reproach? Where is the media on this? They are all over what happened to the cranky birdwatcher in Central Park and they will follow that story until justice is done! Lock that Karen up!

But the head of the FBI cooks up a scam (or at least allows it to be run through his office) to help Hillary Clinton win an election with a fake dossier and leaks that fake information to the press, all to destroy Donald Trump, and the media can’t be bothered. They’re too busy chasing down Central Park Karen and making sure that New Yorkers everywhere are safe from screeching women in parks walking their dogs against the advice of posted signs.

The fate of freedom itself is balanced precariously on the edge of a precipice from which a fall would be unrecoverable. Public attention could pull it back from the abyss, but instead, we’re being given a steady diet of absolute chicanery meant to mislead instead of inform.

Would that the Central Park Karen prosecutor be in charge of the investigation into the FBI! She is using the letter of the law against all hyperventilating Karens! Not only prosecuting, but imparting a national message to the masses! Justice shall prevail and you will learn a valuable lesson, you plebes. It’s also helpful that it has a racial justice vibe that is so fashionable and pays so many social credit dividends.


“Using the police in a way that is both racially offensive and designed to intimidate is something that can’t be ignored,” [assistant DA Joan] Illuzzi-Orbon told the court. “This process can be an opportunity for introspection and education.”

The prosecutor said that over the next few weeks, she’d be exploring with Cooper and her defense lawyer Robert Barnes a program that would have her take responsibility for her actions and educate her and the public.

Assistant DA Joan Illuzzi-Orbon is right. But if using the police in this way is so upsetting, how much more outrageous is it to use our intelligence agencies in a way that is designed to intimidate? Why is Comey footloose and fancy-free after the political hit job he presided over? The bastardization of our nation’s domestic intelligence office and the weaponization of America’s vast technology against political opponents is infinitely more significant than two people arguing in a park and it hasn’t rated a fraction of the same level of official scrutiny. It’s far beyond Watergate and makes breaking into a hotel one night and rifling through some files look like a college prank.

We need criminal justice reform. It is the biggest issue we face as a nation today. If we do not right the massive injustice whereby the scales are weighted in favor of the politically connected and powerful and against the Average Karen, we cannot speak of justice ever again. If we cannot fix it, please let us give up the charade that there is such a thing.


We are becoming a society in which the criminals sitting in jail are the ones who got caught. The biggest crook in the bunch is the guy who gets away with it. “Too smooth and plausible by half,” is Jane Austen’s way of describing a villain. And it’s always they—the ones with the slippery tongues and greased pockets, who subvert justice, weasel in and out of public power, and evade retribution—who tear at the fabric of our system. It cannot stand, this tiered reality where the powerful can do whatever they want, commit any crime, break any law, and face nothing while more than two million people sit in jail.

We need criminal justice reform and it should start with the prosecution of James Comey for the false FISA warrants he signed and the false investigation he launched. And if that doesn’t happen, then open the prisons, for justice is meaningless and the law is dead.

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