Weekend Parting Shot: Happy Graduation!

Happy Friday, Gentle Readers,

I pray this missive finds you well. Long-time readers of this feature may recall my struggles with our garage door, which always seemed to jump the track right around sundown. About a month ago, it finally gave up the ghost. As it turns out, the children of some of the previous occupants of our home, in addition to using the door as a canvas for undecipherable crayon art, also used it as a drum set. We needed to wait until we had the money, but once we had it, Mrs. Brown turned to me and said, “Get. It. Fixed.” 

Husbands, you know that look your wife gets that says, “You have sixty seconds to comply?” Yeah, that was the look. As I write this, I am listening to the noise of drills, ratchets, and who knows what else. That is the sound of $2,000 leaving the building. 

Happy graduation, sort of.

It’s graduation season. Last week, the elementary school down the street from me ended classes for the year. The kids were fine, excited to run around and hoot and holler. The parents surprised me. They drove up and down the street, screaming, yelling, and honking horns for two hours. Don’t get me wrong, I understand milestones and all of that, but no one was graduating with a PhD. I know, I’m an old grouch. The people in my neighborhood were tame, compared to this elementary school graduation in West Memphis, Ark.:

The mind reels as to what must have transpired for a brawl to break out at an elementary graduation. The fact that the children had to tell the parents to behave themselves tells you who the adults were in the room. 

Higher education is looking pretty bleak as well. Here is the scene from MIT’s commencement exercises:

This is the most VILE speech. Shame on you @MIT Imagine a Jew graduating from MIT today. I’m beyond disgusted—I’m enraged. The commencement stage, meant to honor years of hard work, was hijacked by the class president’s hateful, divisive drivel—spewing woke nonsense that props… pic.twitter.com/HdsNTu7yf3

— Afshine Emrani MD FACC (@afshineemrani) May 30, 2025

Oh, thank God. We are getting another infusion of immature, coddled, entitled, clueless SJWs with zero skills and an inflated sense of relevance. I was afraid we were running low. I’m not sure what the job market is for narcissistic tantrum throwers, but I’m fairly certain those are positions that AI can fill. Or your average toddler. Once again, we have empirical proof that a college diploma is less valuable (and useful) than a roll of one-ply toilet paper. 

Intelligence, it would seem, can skip a generation, as is evidenced by one Mykale Baker. Mykale recently graduated from Mills Creek High School in Dacula, Ga. Breitbart notes that on his graduation night, Mykale saw that the Burger King where he worked was getting hit with a late-night rush, so he clocked in, still wearing his graduation clothes, and went to work. That caught the eye of Maria Mendoza, who posted a video of Mykale on TikTok, along with a GoFundMe link.

By Thursday, the account had picked up nearly $50,000. Mykale thanked Mendoza and her followers, saying:

Thank you so much, I was thinking of taking a gap year because I didn’t have money for school, but thank you to all of you now, I might actually go straight to technical college and get my mechanical [sic]. I never thought this would happen to me, I’m very thankful.

Did you catch that? He’s going to a technical college. Not Harvard, not Columbia, and most definitely not MIT. Roughly translated, this means:

• While MIT grads are jump-starting their Priuses for the umpteenth time, Mykale will be walking through the showroom floor of the local Mercedes-Benz dealership.
• While MIT grads are pouring coffee and whining about the patriarchy and their uniforms, Mykale will be having his Callaway clubs re-gripped.
• While MIT grads are coming to terms with the fact that a degree in Keffiyeh Studies does not translate into a six-figure salary, Mykale will be opening champagne to celebrate the opening of his new business. 
• While MIT grads are looking for bail money after a night of Antifa-style chaos, Mykale will be in flying first class and sipping mimosas.

The score thus far?

Hard Work: 7,562,873

College Education: 0. At least nowadays.

Wine recommendation:

Because while Mykale may be too young to toast his future, there is no reason you can’t.

It's been a while since we've had a white wine, so allow me to introduce you to the 2022 Sean Minor California Series Sauvignon Blanc.

I must admit to a slight bias, as I prefer Sauvignon Blanc over almost anything, depending on the food. At first, this may seem like a standard-issue Sauvignon Blanc, but when properly chilled, it will make a great addition to your table, patio, or deck, especially as the weather warms up. 

Dry and nicely acidic, this wine is aged in a combination of stainless steel and neutral French oak barrels. The result is a well-balanced blend of pear, green apple, peach, and a pronounced citrus presence. Look for some grapefruit, a dash of orange, and a hint of lime. Some reviewers picked up kiwi, but I guess my palate is not quite that sophisticated. Yes, you can go the usual route with shrimp, but we had it on the patio with cheese, crackers, and a little salmon, and it was perfect.

It has a good reputation among reviewers, consistently earning high marks, while costing anywhere from $9 to $18. 

That's it for me. Have a great weekend, and I'll see you next time.

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