Clown Alert! Four Things the Leftists Hope You Missed This Week

AP Photo/Jacquelyn Martin

America’s Bolshies were making moves this week, and some of them blew up spectacularly into their snotty Marxist mugs. They would probably prefer you not read this article, but that won’t stop you.

1. Jason Aldean’s “Racist” Courthouse

First, let’s talk about that Jason Aldean video that keeps your green-haired, trans-pansexual sister-in-law awake at night. Never mind that she/zhe/sheep never heard of Aldean before. Once zhe/zsa-zsa was told to jump, compliance kicked in.

The leftoid cranks screamed that Aldean’s video promoted lynching after an unemployed C.H.U.D. popped out of mumsie’s basement and revealed that a century ago, a black man was hung in front of the courthouse that is seen throughout the video.

How dare Aldean not search the history of what might have happened near a building?

What the self-loathers on the left failed to realize — or chose to ignore — is that Miley Cyrus, as Hannah Montana, shot a scene in front of the same building in her 2009 film, “The Movie.”

Why did Cyrus get a pass and not Aldean? Do you really need me to answer that? Okay!

Aldean is one of those abhorrent, straight, white men, and he is — even worse — a country music artist. I count four reasons for the left to fear him and weep violently into their N-95s.


Miley Cyrus, on the other hand, is a bisexual woman … sometimes. On other days, she’s “pansexual.” At her rainbow best, she was tagged a “queer superhero.” But no matter how she is “identifying” these days, she is and always will be a former Disney icon. In other words, she’s commie royalty.

2. Old Enough to Know Better?

In a show of ignorance that would impress Rep. Hank Johnson (Dope-Ga.), Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee (Dolt-Texas) testified that teens are mature enough to have their genitals surgically removed to appease the trans gods — after stating previously that they are too immature to go to jail for the crimes they commit.

FACTLESS-O-RAMA! Rep. Hank Johnson once worried Guam would “capsize” in this now-famous, hilarious video I totally recommend watching. Yet despite his 2010 assclownery, Johnson has been re-elected ever since.

Rep. Lee declared a while back that “the brain doesn’t fully mature until at least 25 years old” in regards to sending teens and early 20-somethings to prison for their crimes.

Rep. Mike Johnson (R-La., not to be confused with Rep. Hank Johnson) was kind enough to point out Lee’s flip-flop immediately after she entered the room at a House Judiciary Subcommittee hearing on “The Dangers and Due Process Violations of Gender-Affirming Care for Children”:

I just want to note that on May 13 of 2021, subcommittee member here on judiciary — our colleague, Miss Sheila Jackson Lee, who just walked in the room — I’m going to quote you, because you said, and I think it’s up on the screen there —
in essence … ‘the brain doesn’t fully mature until at least 25 years old.’ Does that tell us about high school students, middle schoolers, and yes, young people who make, make rash or irreverent or spontaneous decisions — should that be their life? Now admittedly, she was saying this in the context of a criminal subcommittee hearing, but I think that is a truism. I think she stated an obvious fact that everybody should acknowledge.


Lee doubled down on her contradictory codswallop and agreed that people from their teens to roughly 25 years of age shouldn’t be held responsible for their crimes, but they can decide to have their reproductive organs carved up. “You’re absolutely right,” Lee fired back. “That hearing, if I might quote it specifically, as the Chair of the committee — it was made during a committee hearing entitled, ‘The juvenile justice pipeline and the road back to integration.'”

FACT-O-RAMA! The Washington Post ran an article about how people shouldn’t be able to buy a gun until they are 25 years old. I was unable to find a WaPo article suggesting people wait until their 25th birthday to have their genitals ginsued.

Lee went on to argue that “trans teens” should have the right to chop themselves up if their parents are down with the clownery.

She did not mention whether or not teens should go to prison if their parents consent to the crimes they commit.

3. Rapper Lizard-Boi in da HOUSE!

In one of the saddest attempts to remain relevant since former Virginia Gov. Ralph Northum tried to moonwalk his way out of a blackface allegation, Sen. Chuck Schumer (Derp-N.Y.) sharpened his butt-kissing skills last week by hitching his wagon to the 50th anniversary of hip hop.

DUH DOY-O-RAMA! While leftist lickspittles whine about a Jason Aldean video, legendary reptile Sen. Schumer, 72, was eager to slither his way into the news by pretending he was someone aligned with hip-hop music, a “uniquely American” musical genre that glorifies killing police officers and white people.


It was a mere two years ago that Lizard Boi beclowned himself and attempted to rap and dance on stage for votes.

This reminds me of when Schumer tried to do stand-up comedy and bombed like the Enola Gay.

4. Disorder in the Court

Immediately prior to the hoopla of Hunter Biden’s plea deal imploding, some serious skullduggery was taking place.

U.S. District Judge Maryellen Noreika was not pleased after a lawyer who works for the same law firm that represents Hunter Biden called the court clerk in Delaware and, pretending to work for the prosecutor, asked for some evidence to be kept confidential. Attorney Jessica Bengals allegedly misrepresented who she works for when contacting the court — and it could cost her.

“Hi Ted, Following up on our recent telephone conversation, the woman who called was a Jessica Bengels,” court official Samantha Grimes confirmed in an email to Theodore Kittila of the prosecutor’s office. “She said she worked with Theodore Kittila and it was important the document was removed immediately or they could file a motion to seal. I do deeply apologize for all the confusion on our part.”

Noreika has ordered both sides to speak directly with her — not the clerks — if they have any issues.

Related: Here’s to the Whistleblowers

If true, this malfeasance could and should leave some serious ripples on the pond. But when the U.S. population seems not to care that the world’s richest pedophile somehow killed himself while the guards were asleep, the cameras were broken, and his cellmate was magically elsewhere, it’s easy to see how nothing might come of this, and the public will be okay with it.


Chances are, Team Biden is counting on just such a outcome.


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