Kim Jong Ill? Chubby Dictator Kim Jong Un Allegedly Snags a Case of the Bat Stew Flu

(AP Photo/David Guttenfelder. File)

North Korea’s dictator Kim Jong Un has reportedly come down with a blistering case of the Hong Kong Fluey.

FACT-O-RAMA! COVID feeds on the obese.

His somewhat cute, though reportedly demonic, sister, Kim Yo Jong, appeared on North Korean TV and remarked that her brother was “seriously ill with a high fever.”

AP/Reuters Feed Library

Rumor has it that Kim Yo Jong would reportedly replace her “Divine Leader” brother if he were to conk. This can only be bad news for the rest of the world since daddy’s little girl is considered by some to be the toughest cookie yet in a family with a proven history of savagery.

Related: Kim Jong Un’s Sister Blames South Korea for COVID-19 Outbreak, Promises ‘Deadly’ Revenge

NOT A FACT-O-RAMA! Kim Jong Un declared “victory” over the Chinese virus on Aug. 10, claiming that North Korea lost only 74 people since April, calling it an “unprecedented miracle.” Never mind that North Korea is “widely documented” as undercounting COVID-19, not to mention that they have a decrepit healthcare system and widespread malnutrition.


Kim Jong Un disappeared for a while in 2020 after surgery, leaving the world crossing their fingers wondering if he had cashed in his chips. He soon emerged and went back to fulfilling his duties as a lunatic tyrant.


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