Dr. Helen

Are Women without Kids Failures?

Vox Day at Alpha Game Blog had this to say:

Most of the mothers I know used to proudly declare they never wanted to have children. Not some of them, not many of them, MOST of them. That is why the correct response to a young woman declaring that she doesn’t want to have children is to laugh at her, because bearing children is the prime raison d’etre for every woman. The woman who fails to do so is, quite literally, a failure as a human being.

I don’t think men who have no children are “failures,” nor do I think women who have no children are “failures.” I think that people make choices in life that are right or seem right for them at the time. People are autonomous beings who may or may not want children. While I agree that our culture is a negative one that often mistakenly tells women to go only for careers and other pursuits rather than have children, I do think there are some women who do not want them. This choice may be wrong for some but not for all.

I had a friend in college who didn’t want kids. She is happy today many years later without them. That is her choice. It should be everyone’s to decide what is right for their own life. To call that a failure for that decision seems extreme. What are your thoughts? Should men or women without kids be said to be “failures”?

Update: Vox Day responds.