As “Tomb Raider” opens in theaters this weekend, fans of the video games and the 2001 film featuring Angelina Jolie have expressed displeasure at the much more normal and realistic size of Alicia Vikander’s breasts. One particular YouTube artist, T.J. Kirk, has incurred widespread wrath for stating his dissatisfaction. His remarks proved quite vulgar.
“Do I have to be the a**hole who says her t*ts are too small for me to see her as Lara Croft? Do I have to be that guy? Do I have to be the one who f**king says it? I guess I do. Sorry,” Kirk, who goes by “Amazing Atheist Guy” on Twitter, tweeted.
Do I have to be the asshole who says her tits are too small for me to see her as Lara Croft? Do I have to be that guy? Do I have to be the one who fucking says it?
I guess I do. Sorry. pic.twitter.com/5CsXwYFjBb
— 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐀𝐦𝐚𝐳𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐀𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐬𝐭 (@amazingatheist) March 10, 2018
He received a quick and very negative response. The message, “you also have the option to not be trash,” received 25K “likes.”
you also have the option to not be trash
— derek (creeping insect) (@derekdirge) March 11, 2018
Kirk went on to flesh out his complaints in a vulgar YouTube video. “Today, I would like to talk about the size of Lara Croft’s t*ts,” he began. “I vocally want to see a character with iconically big t*ts have big t*ts.”
The YouTuber admitted that “in recent games, Lara has undergone a breast reduction.” He insisted that, from early on, “Lara Croft was depicted as ridiculously buxom in an obvious effort to appeal to the male gaze.” (The video is below. Warning: It is extremely vulgar.)
Kirk was not alone in lamenting Vikander’s physique. “The new tomb raider girl doesn’t really have the b**bs to be Lara Croft,” one critic of the casting choice tweeted.
The new tomb raider girl doesn’t really have the boobs to be Lara Croft
— God, whats that (@GamerUKGuy) March 13, 2018
“Alicia vikander is stunning but as a Lara Croft character you need a bigger b**bs,” another user tweeted.
Even so, the backlash against Kirk proved much larger than any support he received.
“The people talking about Alicia’s b**bs being too small…. well, their opinions do not matter and neither do they, because this movie is not for them. It’s for us,” a self-described Laura Croft cosplayer tweeted.
“Lara Croft is a badass character and she isn’t defined by the size of her boobs. No woman is defined by the size of her boobs.
#StopObjectifyingWoman2018,” another user tweeted.
— Donna Hanscum RP Fan Account (@DHanscum) March 12, 2018
While many versions of Lara Croft were quite well-endowed, the very first version did not look much like Angelina Jolie at all.
“When Tomb Raider was released in 1996, Lara Croft’s b**bs were triangular,” another user tweeted. “Let’s stop acting like the size/shape of a woman’s breasts predict her ability to play Lara Croft. It doesn’t really matter whether you ‘see’ Alicia Vikander as Lara Croft… she is, deal with it.”
Playing off this riff, an artist posted a photoshopped image with Vikander’s breasts the way Lara Croft’s appeared in the original video game. “Some people have been complaining that Lara’s boobs look too small in the new Tomb Raider Movie. Don’t worry, I got you fam,” the artist tweeted.
Some people have been complaining that Lara's boobs look too small in the new Tomb Raider Movie.
Don't worry, I got you fam. pic.twitter.com/1o4So7LuxB
— DΞΔTH!NK (@deathink) March 12, 2018
One enterprising Twitter user took T.J. Kirk’s original tweet and introduced this triangle theme. “Do I have to be the a**hole who says her t*ts aren’t triangle enough for me to see her as Lara Croft? Do I have to be that guy? Do I have to be the one who f**king says it? I guess I do. Sorry,” he tweeted.
Do I have to be the asshole who says her tits aren’t triangle enough🔺 for me to see her as Lara Croft😤? Do I have to be that guy🤷♂️? Do I have to be the one who fucking says it 📣?
I guess I do. Sorry.😡👌🏻💯 pic.twitter.com/66qYqfvGDW
— yung earth creationist (@KeirWilsonSim) March 12, 2018
On a separate note, Vikander adopted an epic training and dieting program for the new film. As NowThis pointed out, the actress “trained her a** off for the 2018 reboot. She spent 7 months working out twice a day, and adopted the Keto diet 2 months before filming to put on 12 lbs of muscle.”
— NowThis (@nowthisnews) March 16, 2018
Ironically, even Angelina Jolie’s ample breasts were not considered enough for the 2001 film, so she wore a padded bra to boost her bra size from a 36C to a 36DD.
The push against “toxic masculinity” has gone too far, but so has this demand for ample breasts. Lara Croft is more than her bra size, and Alicia Vikander seems more than up to the task of capturing her character.
Watch the trailer below.