Culture

A Punch in the Gut: The Aftermath of 9/11

911reflections

When 9/11 happened, I was a communications undergrad studying filmmaking. Therefore, I decided there’d be no other way to honor 9/11 than to turn its aftermath into a star-studded film pitch. Since historical dramas tend to be hot these days (from Downton Abbey to Hyde Park on Hudson, the 20th century is in) I thought I’d give it a historical bent. You know, not to make any points or anything, just for the ratings. So, I present to you for workshopping the first draft of: AFTERMATH: THE PRE/SEQUEL TO 9/11.

Obama FDR

This guy is The Lead. He makes all kinds of promises, starting off with social reforms to “improve” the economy that boil down to a bunch of new taxes and the increased socialization of the American government, but people like him because he photographs well. He prefers golf to politics (after all, you gotta save face) so he sends out…

kerrychamberlain

…his Right-Hand-Man. He’s happy for a supporting-character role and has prepped for the part by getting a bit of work done. He’s got people on the inside who hook him up with some interesting news about “The Bad Guy.”

Assad

No, not this guy. This guy is the Fall Guy. He made a deal with the last Fall Guy to store some weapons of mass destruction, but lately he’s gotten a little too big for his britches and needs to be taken down a notch, lest he draw too much attention to The Bad Guy.

putin_stalin

That’s where this guy comes in: The Negotiator. He makes a deal with the Right-Hand-Man to put the Fall Guy in his place, flexing his muscles on the world stage and getting a little credit coming his way. Not that he’s going to share it with the Lead, mind you. He’s already got a deal with…

HitlerAhmadinejad

…The Bad Guy. He’s going to let the Fall Guy take the hit and milk his relationship with The Negotiator for all it’s worth. He might stick with him, he might take the nukes and run. Either way, he knows he’s going to get away with it because he just watched his enemy, The Great Satan, fight a long, drawn-out conflict. They’re tired. They don’t feel like dealing with his crap anymore so they’re just going to give in.

"I get that Fox opposes the Syria peace plan because its modus operandi is to foment dissent in the form of a relentless, irrational contrarianism to Barack Obama and all things Democratic to advance its ultimate objective of creating a deliberately misinformed body politic whose fear, anger, mistrust and discontent is the manna upon which it sustains its parasitic, succubus like existence..." - Jon Stewart

“I get that Fox opposes the Syria peace plan because its modus operandi is to foment dissent in the form of a relentless, irrational contrarianism to Barack Obama and all things Democratic to advance its ultimate objective of creating a deliberately misinformed body politic whose fear, anger, mistrust and discontent is the manna upon which it sustains its parasitic, succubus like existence…” – Jon Stewart

After all, it isn’t as if those anti-war celebrities are going to want to attack him — they wouldn’t want to be accused of drawing America into another long, drawn-out conflict within the region they just left. That’d be as crazy as returning to Europe to fight a war because the truce you crafted 20-odd years prior was doomed to fail. And no one’s liked war, not since Vietnam — The Bad Guy’s socialist forebears, including the Right-Hand Man, made sure of that. (It’ll be in the prequel.)

winniebibi

What the Bad Guy really has to worry about is the Little Satan and their prime Minister. This guy draws some serious red lines. And, to paraphrase Walter Sobchak, “3,000 years of beautiful tradition from Moses to Sandy Koufax, you better believe,” the prime minister isn’t screwing around. Sure, he’s relatively small in the scheme of things, but these people know how to put up a fight — and win. (That’ll be in the sequel for sure.)