33 Headlines Today That Know the Secret For Grabbing Your Attention


Editor’s Note: This is a new feature gathering each day’s most shocking headlines around the web, highlighting the way narratives of crime, death, and unusual sex swirl together to fuel emotion and web traffic. Send stories you’d like to see featured to @DaveSwindle.

Cross-posted from Vodkapundit at Lifestyle today, a new blog highlighting women and weapons:

1. New Blogs: Guns and Curves

In 2011 I found myself in a situation where I needed to protect myself. At first I just wanted to learn how disarm somebody with a gun in the event that I ever was in a situation that warranted it. But, after handling a gun for the first time, I realized that it wasn’t something to be afraid of, but rather something to be respected.

Two stories Via the New York Post front page today:


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3. Stephen Collins plays pedophile priest in short film

In his latest short film, Stephen Collins, who is accused of molesting children, plays a pedophile priest.

The 10-minute movie, “Penance,” directed by Jeff Wolfe, co-stars David Lyons as Thomas Walker, a man haunted by his personal demons and traumatic past, reports People.

The former “7th Heaven” star, 67,  plays the priest Thomas visits to “clear his conscience and discover exactly what it means to find forgiveness … or to give it,” said the movie’s official site.

At the Huffington Post today:

4. Marine Suspected In Death Of Transgender Filipino Woman May Be Charged This Week
5. Nepal Avalanche, Blizzard Kill 12 People, Including Foreign Trekkers
6. Leo Sheng, Transgender Man, Documents Transition Through Instagram
7. Women Die When Domestic Abusers Keep Their Guns
8. Newspaper Publisher, Family Found Dead Inside Oklahoma Home
9. Man Accused Of Making Child Porn In House Where Mom Ran Daycare Center

Gawker headlines:

10. Vanilla Sex: A Perfectly Fine Way to F****
11. Passenger Forced Airplane Lavatory Door Open, Sexually Assaulted Woman
12. Drunk Zombie Santa Terrorizes Minnesota Family, Pukes in Their House
13. Horny Teen Caught Making Love to Stuffed Horse in Walmart Bedding Dept
14. Supreme Court Blocks Texas From Shutting Down Abortion Clinics
15. Cops Charge 10-Year-Old Boy as Adult in Slaying of 90-Year-Old Woman

Via Drudge today:

16. Man arrested for lewd act with stuffed animal inside WALMART...

17. Halloween display terrifies neighbors with blood-splattered dolls, severed heads…


New data shows more young people are waiting to marry – and there’s no shortage of opinions on why that’s happening.

According to the latest available census data, the percentage of U.S. adults who have never been married has hit a new, all-time high.

In 1960, about one in ten adults over the age of 25 fell into that category.

By 2012, the number had jumped to one in five.

These 3 headlines appeared together:

19. Iran executions surge amid U.S. nuke talks…

20. City subpoenas church pastors for sermons dealing with homosexuality…

22. Harvard Law profs decry tough new crackdown on campus sex assaults…

At the Daily Beast:

23. Bulgaria’s Vampire Graveyards

Vampires may be greeted with swoons today, but in medieval Eastern Europe they were dealt a metal spike through the chest.

Last week, Bulgarian archaeologists unearthed an unusual 13th-century grave in an ancient city named Thracian.

The bones are encrusted in dirt, revealing a bowed, partially crushed skull and a round stake emerging from the left side of the skeleton’s chest. The interred is believed to be a middle-aged man, who was incapacitated post-death—cause unknown—by a two-pound iron rod thrust through his heart and the removal of the lower half of his left leg. Both mutilations were meant to stop the man, who villagers believed was a vampire, from returning to haunt the town and prey upon its inhabitants, researchers say.

24. The Perils of Glitzy Celebrity Feminism Having a Moment

Does Beyoncé’s feminism, one glitzy word emblazoned behind a beautiful superstar post-pole dancing routine, actually reflect and reaffirm modern-day feminism as we know it? Has Beyoncé helped take the shame away from identifying with an important political project, or has she simply adopted the term “feminist” into her own self-affirming lexicon, without bothering to truly understand the real world implications of that word or the movement it alludes to? In other words, is Beyoncé promoting a nuanced conversation and real-world action, or is she just promoting herself?

At Jezebel today:

25. Anita Sarkeesian Cancels Speaking Event in Light of Shooting Threat

Video game critic, blogger, and founder of Feminist Frequency Anita Sarkeesian was supposed to give a speech about the role of women in video games Utah State University today. However, Sarkeesian, one of the prominent targets of #Gamergate, chose to cancel the event after the school received a threat of a mass shooting if she gave her talk.

26.Pastor Has Sex with Congregants, Lies About AIDS, Refuses to Step Down

27. Girl Group SNH48’s Lesbian Music Video Reportedly Banned In Korea

28. Black Flag Co-Founder Accused of Child Abuse

29. Is There Any Such Thing as a Dangerous Sex Position?

30. Kesha Reportedly Wrote a Song About Relationship with Alleged Abuser

Kesha may have written a song about her alleged abuser, Dr. Luke, with lyrics referring to selling her soul and more.

The singer filed a lawsuit against Dr. Luke alleging physical abuse and drug coercion (he countered with a suit of his own in response). Some are speculating that Kesha may have written about what she endured in at least one of her past songs. As Buzzfeed points out, the song “Dancing with the Devil,” an unreleased track popular with fans, may have been inspired by her relationship with the producer.

The high-minded point of this exercise? To remember that these gods of sex and violence aren’t new. Today’s palate-cleansing scripture is from 1 Kings 16:31-34:

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1 Kings 16:31-34

A post shared by Dave And maura (@daveandmaura23) on

Updated: This one from the Daily Beast demands inclusion…

31. Denmark’s Bestiality Problem: It’s Legal

Denmark already has a handful of animal brothels which, according to Ice News, a site specialized in Nordic reporting, charge between $85 and $170 depending on the animal of choice.  “When the rules have been tightened in the rest of Europe, there’s a risk that Denmark will be considered a refuge for people with this proclivity,” the minister said, according to AFP. “That’s why I want to send a clear signal that Denmark is not a refuge for people who want to sexually exploit animals.”

Danish news sources have quoted a recent Gallup poll, which found that just 76 percent of the Danish population support the new law, which implies that 24 percent of the population would like freedom of movement when it comes to pursuing beasts for pleasure.

32. The Atlantic’s most popular story today: The Adultery Arms Race

One might assume that the proliferation of such spyware would have a chilling effect on extramarital activities. Aspiring cheaters, however, need not despair: software developers are also rolling out ever stealthier technology to help people conceal their affairs. Married folk who enjoy a little side action can choose from such specialized tools as Vaulty Stocks, which hides photos and videos inside a virtual vault within one’s phone that’s disguised to look like a stock-market app, and Nosy Trap, which displays a fake iPhone home screen and takes a picture of anyone who tries to snoop on the phone. CATE (the Call and Text Eraser) hides texts and calls from certain contacts and boasts tricky features such as the ability to “quick clean” incriminating evidence by shaking your smartphone. CoverMe does much of the above, plus offers “military-grade encrypted phone calls.” And in the event of an emergency, there’s the nuclear option: apps that let users remotely wipe a phone completely clean, removing all traces of infidelity.

But every new app that promises to make playing around safer and easier just increases the appetite for a cleverer way to expose such deception. Some products even court both sides: a partner at CATE walked me through how a wife could install the app on her husband’s phone to create a secret record of calls and texts to be perused at her leisure.

Updated again: with Mediaite’s contribution:

33. Family Feud Contestant Mercilessly Brings Her Husband’s Penis into It


image illustration via shutterstock /Lars Zahner