Rutting Beasts and Horny College Kids

“You and me baby we ain’t nothin’ but mammals so let’s do it like they do on the Discovery Channel. Do it again now! You and me baby we ain’t nothin’ but mammals, so let’s do it like they do on the Discovery Channel.  Gettin’ horny now!”  ~The Bloodhound Gang~

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xat1GVnl8-k&ob=av2eWho would have ever thought that the theme for Obama re-election campaign would be the Bloodhound Gang song, “The Bad Touch”?  But here we are.  He can’t run on his record.  That would be like sprinting into the DNC headquarters wearing an explosive, terrorist suicide vest.  He won’t run on reducing gas prices (despite his 2008 promise), because he and his administration have said they favor the sort of pain at the pump that acts on the budgets of middle American families like a flesh eating virus.  He can’t run on Obamacare because even in polls that oversample Democrats, the government takeover of the healthcare system is still extremely unpopular.  So what is plan B?  They found a random college chick with enthusiastic sexual habits and pinned all their hopes on the unfertilized eggs in her basket.

For those who have not been introduced to Sandra Fluke yet, she is the victim dejour for the liberals who are trying to pretend that Republicans want to ban all contraception.  She is a Georgetown University student who testified about her sex life to the Democrat members of the House of Representatives.  According to Ms. Fluke, she runs through over $3000 worth of contraception a year while satisfying her sexual appetites.  Or were they run through her?  I guess that doesn’t matter.  The truth is that she attends college in Washington D.C and free condoms are available to her from a score of clinics.  So she really shouldn’t be whining about the cost of safe sex.  For her D.C. should be like trick or treating at Bob Guccione’s home.  Despite this she is insisting that insurance companies pay for her contraception.  So that is Sandra Fluke.  If you are a single guy who lives on the East Coast, you probably already know her.

Sandra is getting her turn on the American Idolesque stage of identity politics that defines how liberals run for office.  The formula is simple:  find someone you can pretend is a victim and try to blame their pain on anyone who doesn’t agree that Planned Parenthood is the moral equivalent of our founding fathers.  The difference with Ms. Fluke is that they are not fighting for the poor or the rights of minorities (in truth they never fought those battles either, but that is another issue), what they are going to battle for is her right to have somebody besides her foot the bill for her lifestyle of unlimited nookie.

Let’s start with the undeniable fact that there is no legislation that has been offered (or even hinted at) that says Ms. Fluke can’t have all the safe sex she wants.  Nobody is trying to deny her access to birth control.  She can use all the contraception she wants so long as it doesn’t violate any international treaties or the laws of time and space.  She just may have to pay for it herself.  If she attends or works for a religious institution whose beliefs prohibit providing her birth control, their verifiable first amendment rights trump her imaginary right to get her freak on.  Despite this, the left is trying to make the argument that the insurance companies (to whom the religious organizations pay their premiums) should be mandated to violate the first amendment and provide birth control to those covered under that religious institutions insurance policy.  The constitution is to be stepped on in favor of a phony woman’s health issue.

Only a person with the IQ of a fiddler crab would call insurance provided birth control a woman’s health issue.  Well that, or somebody who is so hopelessly to the left that they have given up on the constitution in favor of mob rule and free welfare cheese.  Insurance is there for life’s medical emergencies and things that are way out of our control.  If you hear the words “there is a shadow on your lung in the x-ray” insurance is meant to cover that.  If you trip over your wiener dog and break your arm,  Insurance is meant to cover that.  Even if you eat yourself into a rampaging case of diabetes, insurance covers that too.  To assume that insurance should cover Ms. Flukes’s birth control pre-supposes that she is a mindless rutting beast who is physically and intellectually incapable of saying “no” to sex.

Sandra Fluke complained that the price of her birth control was becoming burdensome.  The truth is that her sexual activity is purely recreational.  In other words, sex is her hobby.   Nobody should be mandated to pay for contraceptive devices  that she can easily provide for herself.  If insurance companies are mandated to start providing the accessories for our hobbies than shouldn’t they pay for my D&D supplies as part of a men’s health initiative?

In the end, there might be more going on here than just “health”.  By piling up more mandates, the government forces the insurer to pass the expense on to their customers.  If the premiums get so high that people can’t afford them, their business will evaporate and obviously an insurance company would go bankrupt.  If they try to keep up with every silly little mandate without raising prices, they will hemorrhage cash until they eventually close their doors.  Either way the outcome is the same.  Eventually the choices will become so few that most will wind up enrolled in Obamacare by default.  Who would have thought that the “death by a thousand cuts” approach to killing the healthcare industry would start with something wrapped in latex.