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Adventures in The Patriarchy™: ‘Free Bleeding’

AP Photo/Michel Spingler, File

Chronicling the ongoing intersectional struggle to liberate women — inclusively defined as the legacy kind and the transgenders — from The Patriarchy™, one microaggression at a time.

Woman ‘free bleeds’ on grass, gives menses to Earth

At some point in the recent past, at the intersection (no pun intended) of new-age spiritualism and third-wave feminism, “free bleeding” — meaning, as the term suggests, depositing one’s menses everywhere in public — became an act of progressive self-empowerment, the idea being that, by being encouraged to have their periods privately in a civilized manner, women were suppressed by the Patriarchy™.

(These people really have a quasi-erotic fascination with subjecting the public to all manner of bodily functions in the name of feminism.)

Related: HuffPo Feminist Quits Shaving to Protest for Abortion Rights

This young lady has recorded a TikTok of herself “free-bleeding in the grass” and encouraging other women to do the same, which seems like something that could perhaps pose some kind of public health crisis if the advice were taken seriously en masse in densely populated areas.

“Drop a rose [in the comments] if you’re bleeding too!” she adds.

Related: NPR Releases Hardcore Abortion Porn Audio to Savor on Your Morning Commute

And please remember, bigots: Men can free-bleed too.

“#Bleedingwhiletrans!” reads the sign held by some girl with a butch haircut on a park bench — basically this generation’s Rosa Parks — where presumably some unsuspecting, hapless passerby will sit in the near future.

Related: Liberal Banshees, Distraught Over Election Results, Convene to Scream at Lake Michigan

In related and fascinating news, new research suggests that exposure to artificial light via cell phones may have dramatically altered the natural synchronization of female menstruation with the lunar cycle.

Via Science.org (emphasis added):

To increase reproductive success, many species synchronize reproductive behavior with a particular phase of the lunar cycle. The human menstrual cycle has also a period close to that of the lunar cycle, and recent studies suggest a temporary synchrony between menstrual and lunar cycles. Nevertheless, lunar influence on human reproductive behavior remains controversial. Here, we analyzed long-term menstrual records of individual women from the past 24 years and compared them with records from the past century. We show that women’s menstrual cycles recorded before the introduction of light-emitting diodes in 2010 and the extensive use of smart phones significantly synchronized with the Moon, while those after 2010 coupled to the Moon mostly in January. We hypothesize that the high gravimetric forces between the Moon, Sun, and Earth every January are sufficient for this coupling, while the increasing exposure to artificial light at night impinges on synchrony at other times.

Blue light from iPhones — yet another brutal machination in the long list of misogynistic conspiracies enacted by The Patriarchy™.

Heinous and offensive AI slop vs. feminism

X is awash in these highly offensive AI videos — which I condemn in the harshest terms possible — of female Olympic athletes competing and winning gold for domestic activities such as cooking, washing dishes, and vacuuming.

Besides being generally offended at the misogynistic display, I’m also taken aback by the American competitors winning every time.

No one in their right mind who has experience with foreign women believes American homemakers are the best at their craft — not by a country mile.

Maybe one day we can reclaim the crown as the world’s sole domestic superpower, but let’s not live in denial.

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