Who's Hillary?

Can You Spot Her?

Remember those Where’s Waldo? books that were popular a while back? On each page, there was a cartoon crowd scene and you had to scan the various figures until you found Waldo, the guy in the wool hat and the striped sweater? They should put out a new book called Who’s Hillary? On each page, there’d be dozens of drawings of Hillary and you’d have to figure out which was the real one? If any.

There could be the hip, self-mocking Hillary we were treated to on Saturday Night Democrat Toady — I mean Live! — the other night. There could be the indignant Hillary who tried to weasel out of fair questions on the Today show. There could be Grandma Hillary who just can’t make heads nor tails of those danged email servers — what do you, wipe em with a cloth er sumpin? There could be southern-accent Hillary, and African American Hillary and teary-eyed Hillary…  Hey, if it doesn’t work as a book we can always make it a line of dolls!

Hillary defenders claim there’s no smoking gun to prove her corruption — though when that became our standard for government officials, I don’t know. It may be true there’s no gun, but there’s plenty of smoke. As a U.S. senator, she blocked attempts to regulate the disaster-making mortgage giant Freddie Mac after Freddie made a six-figure donation to the Clinton Foundation. She lobbied China on behalf of a major fiber optic company after they gave the foundation a big donation. She helped an upstate New York real estate developer win building approvals after they gave a donation. And as secretary of State, she — in the form of the Clinton Foundation — took donations from nations that included Kuwait, Qatar, Oman and Algeria, which last she had agreed not to do. What did she do for those countries in return?

But the real question is not whether she’s corrupt. Duh. The question is: Who the hell is she when she’s at home? What does she believe, aside from appeasing this portion of the base or that? What’s her vision, aside from herself in the Oval Office? What’s her pitch to America, aside from the fact she’s female? Really. I can choose between the Republicans on the basis of their policies and their characters. But when it comes to Hillary….  Who the hell is she?