First Lady Michelle Obama Finds the Perfect Side Job. You Won't Believe What Happens Next.

Look out, Clickhole, you have some competition. First Lady Michelle Obama has joined the original annoying viral content site, Upworthy. I’m not even kidding.

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It’s not quite the gig that Chelsea Clinton had at NBC, but it’s something. A start.

The first lady is “guest curating” content at the site that perfected those cliffhanger headlines that even Facebook hates so much.

The first lady has already “curated” her first piece, with a very Upworthy title: “I Really Hope the Parents Of These People Get To See What They Said Here. They’d Probably Cry.”

If I saw what people say, I might cry too, and I’m a guy who has lived through the Jerry Jones Cowboys era without shedding a tear. Or I might run away. Or I might seek psychiatric help. It’s not common to see what people say. Visible words floating around while people are talking to me? That would freak me right out.

In her inaugural piece, Mrs. Obama allows that she is thankful for her three-week orientation at college.

Question: Three weeks? How long does it take to figure out where your classes are and which classes are the most skippable? That’s a week, tops. If you’re a little slow to catch things. Or if you’re distracted by seeing words floating around everybody’s heads.

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The first lady’s first conclusion doesn’t really break any new ground.

Because our young people need to know that no matter where you come from or how much money your family has, you can succeed in college, and get your degree, and then go on to build a better life for yourself.

And the sky is blue. Sherlock would be impressed!

Anyway, the First Lady of Irritating Crap Writing That Has Ruined Blogging Forever still has a mountain of cliches and cliffhangers to climb if she wants to stay ahead of Clickhole. They have a stunning video piece up today. You won’t believe what happens next.

Seriously. You won’t.

My jaw…dropped.

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