Buzz Ballad: That Weiner Wood

—apologies to the Beatles and “Norwegian Wood”

I wanted a girl, despite the fact I married be
I followed her online
Isn’t it good
That Weiner wood?

I sent her a picture intended as a private tweet
As soon as I realized ’twas public, I hit “delete”

Then, I filled and backed–when I was found out,
Claimed I was hacked
But, I lawyered up, and chose not to call
Enforcement at all

And now I’ll try to pass it all off as merely a joke
My sending a student a pic of my “chicken” unchoked

Since there’s no blue dress, I’m confident
I’ll live down this mess
And to new office aspire
Isn’t it good
That Weiner wood?