Sometimes, I despair of ever being able to convey the disdain for women that one may encounter in the Muslim world.
First, many Americans and Europeans simply do not want to believe it; they absolutely refuse to surrender their belief that all people are both “good” and the “same.” Some westerners do not think it is politically correct, or even polite to say so–especially if people really are “different.” Thus, for both reasons, westerners will deny the extent to which most women are despised, feared, controlled, and punished in the Muslim world. Some westerners also say: “Women are oppressed here as well. It’s racist to single out an entire culture and people for the ways in which women are mistreated everywhere.”
Many Muslims, who live both in the West and in Muslim lands, will deny, outright, that Muslim women are mistreated. First, precisely because this is true, they are well trained to deny it–it is shameful to say so; doing so, disgraces and endangers the family and the Muslim nation. Also, most people are trained not to “see” that which is normalized all around them.
Some time ago, I met with a small group of charming, heartbreakingly sophisticated, educated, assimilated, modern, secular Muslims. They drank, they smoke, they danced with members of the opposite (and of the same sex), they did not limit their friendships to Muslims-only, they were divorced men and women. From an Islamic/Islamist view, they were mighty sinners, maybe even “heretics.” Of course, I loved them, they were so cosmopolitan.
Nevertheless, they hotly denied that honor killings exist because, in their circles, they had neither seen nor heard of any such thing. In their experience, most Muslims are tolerant and fun-loving. They glided over the facts of polygamy and child marriage because, in their lives, it was a very rare occurrence. They viewed America as the greatest “terrorist” power and sympathized with Islamic terrorists who had been “driven to terrorism because they’d seen either their parents or their children murdered or maimed;” they believed that Islam had been “far kinder to Jews than Christianity had ever been.” As for Muslim dissidents and feminists? “They are only a handful of people whom the West rewards for generalizing from their own bad experiences. What they are saying is not true for most Muslims.”
Trust me, I more than held my own in this discussion but, emotionally and intellectually, it exhausted me. These are the “good” Muslims. They are not personally violent, they do not sponsor violence, they move easily in both the Western and Eastern worlds, and yet, their knowledge base is restricted to their own experience and to the mainstream media in the West which encourages precisely such beliefs. Perhaps they are also part of an alarmingly selfish generation which relates everything back to themselves and lacks compassion for others who are not like them.
I have recently spoken to a number of people who have been in Iraq, Kuwait, Saudi Arabia, Iran, and Afghanistan. Their stories of life in a war zone match some of my own stories of long ago in Kabul, Afghanistan long before the Khomeini revolution, the Soviet invasion, and the rise of the Taliban. Here is a tale that pre-dates any twentieth century colonial or imperial invasion of Afghanistan, that took place when Kabul was just entering a peaceful and modern period that would last for nearly two decades.
I had asked to visit a maternity hospital and was having tea with the doctor-in-charge. Suddenly, a man, wearing a turban and a long, quilted coat barged in. The doctor spoke to him very brusquely, with annoyance. “You brought your wife here too late. The baby is already dead. Your wife–not long, maybe a few hours more.” The doctor turned to me and said: “These provincials always come when it’s too late.”
And then both the man and the doctor were yelling at each other. I assumed that the man wanted the doctor to go and save his wife. Not so. The man was refusing to pay any hospital fees because not only would he have to pay for his wife’s and child’s burial, he would now have to buy another wife to cook for him and take care of his other children. And where, in the name of Allah, did the doctor think he’d be able to get that kind of money? He’d already paid for a car to transport his wife all the way from their village.”
Today, there are far many more examples of women being held in disdain in that beautiful, treacherous country. Denying that this is so, blaming the foreign invaders, is surely as great a problem as is the deadly disdain itself.
The fact that kind, well-informed Westerners are heartless and ignorant when it comes to the condition of women in the Islamic world is a great mystery. The whole world, from Finland to Venezuela to Sri Lanka to Japan, gets all worked up about the asymetry of Israel’s response to the rockets that came from the Gaza Strip. The world can’t criticize the Islamic crimes as long as Israel exists.
How do we get these women to the United States for safety reasons
Merlin
“…is a great mystery.”
Nothing could be further from the truth. It is very easy to understand. Radical Muslims are predominantly dark skinned individuals and we disgusting white Westerners have supposedly no right to question their values. Also, the very moment that you admit the problem exists—you are compelled to become a mature adult. These spoiled rotten, secular yuppies prefer to remain directionless and selfish.
There is little doubt that the more “sophisticated” Muslims possess advanced degrees behind their names. They are truly elites. And yet, we can expect no leadership from these individuals. Moreover, they are normally hostile toward those fighting this existential fight to the death. And you can also take for granted that the vast majority of them voted for Barack Obama. They rightfully sense that he is a kindred spirit.
“Good” Moslems indeed!
In fact, this shows exactly why we really can’t depend on “good”, “moderate”, Moslems to help us in this current struggle against Islam.
And we are helpless to influence our immigration policies.Nothing we do, even as organized closed border proponents, can influence the corporate democrats who listen only to big business who wants that cheap labor.
Merlin, Muslim women should be given political asylum status if they want to live free. But even women subject to genital mutilation are rejected for citizenship (google genital mutilation and immigration).
Only male Muslims who reject retaliatory terror as a legitimate weapon, reject gender apartheid, slave garments, special religious schooling and who accept equal rights for women should be allowed to immigrate here. But feminists don’t care or are brainwashed by the left and in any case are not influential. Those women such as Hillary who might be considered influential ignore the issue. Her supporters silence women such as myself who keep brining it up. Privately, they call us racist and ignorant — fearful as Obama put it to his money men – clinging to guns and religion. Well he is right about guns. Everyone I know is buying guns.
There are Saudi schools in the US for males, madrases in all but name. In the US, women in full slave garments from Somalia and other countries,head scarves everywhere on campus, special religious rights demanded, prayers blaring out on loudspeakers 5 times a day in previously quiet neighborhoods, families sending their children to be indoctrinated in Pakistan before they return to the US, US Muslim girls “home schooled” and sold in marriage to foreigners eager to immigrate to the US as “spouses”.
And these people will vote, vote on the equal rights amendment and choice. So are there thousands of women signing the petition to require our government to work to upgrade the status of women under Islam? So far only 500 people have signed.
http://www.petitiononline.com/savenow/
People might be good and the same when they are born for the most part. But by age three socialization takes place and they repeat what they’ve been told and act out what they’ve been taught. It can be Dora the Explorer or Osama the mujahideen / sharia law mufti.
The fatal flaw of multiculturalism, ironically, is not giving a damn what actually goes on in other cultures, especially dominant imperialistic “doubly totalitarian” systems like Islam.
http://www.andrewbostom.org/blog/2009/03/11/geert-wilders-and-totalitarian-islam/
GH Bousquet in 1950:
Islam first came before the world as a doubly totalitarian system. It claimed to impose itself on the whole world and it claimed also, by the divinely appointed Muhammadan law, by the principles of fiqh, to regulate down to the smallest details the whole life of the Islamic community and of every individual believer…Viewed from this angle, the study of Muhammadan Law (dry and forbidding though it may appear to be to those who confine themselves to the indispensable study of the fiqh), is of great importance to the world of today.
“And we are helpless to influence our immigration policies.”
I am utterly convinced that our immigration policies are overly influenced by race card politics. If the Hispanics illegally coming over our borders possessed blue eyes and blond hair—the problem would be solved overnight. Unfortunately, they are dark skinned and all hell breaks lose. There is no chance of saving Western Civilization unless we confront the pernicious ideology of white race guilt. And God help us if David Duke and his ilk dominate this long ignored and unavoidable dialogue.
Immigration is far more influenced by money then race. The Mexicans who picked all the fruit and vegetables for our meals that did not come from a personal garden had to risk their lives for the privledge of performing back-breaking labor for barely enough to survive on and can be deported any minute.
The Arabs who burn our flag and have turned our universities into hotbeds of leftist rhetoric/hate bought their way in on student visas.Blonde hair is less impotant then green paper.Perhaps we should carefully examine why someone wants to be in the USA.
I am always amused by the people who denigrate Mexicans. They know nothing of agriculture or our economy’s dependance on this source of labor. I wish someone could justify what good has come from our universities swelling their enrollment with Arabs. They do not return to their countries with a respect for ours. How do people who behead their wives benefit our society? Are we so unsure of American values that we want people that bring that sort of culture here?
“I am always amused by the people who denigrate Mexicans. They know nothing of agriculture or our economy’s dependance on this source of labor.”
And this is why we allow for legal immigration and work permits. We do indeed need a large number of these Mexicans to work in the United States. However, there are limits of just how many can be permitted into the country. A sensible compromise must be found. It would also help immeasurably if everyone involved in this discussion could pretend that Mexicans looked like freckled faced hillbillies living in the deep South.
islamics all stink male and female. we let them into our universities and they are terrorizing jewish students and our president does and says nothing. school administrators do and say nothing. politicians do and say nothing. the barbarians are inside our gates. this is how rome fell and if we don’t get our act together and kick them back to their own stinking countries we will fall as well. if the stench doesn’t get us first. i suggest we get them out just on the basis of destroying the ozone layer. perhaps the cowardly ninnies who are ruining all our lives can warm up to that.
response to George – Hi George, I am a Western woman, but I’m not heartless or ignorant of the astrocities against Muslim women. I think it’s a disgrace, and our society, at least most women in our country, believe this to be a crime against humanity.
Be careful that you don’t alienate us. Keep informing, but please don’t criticize so much.
For I am an abused woman to, carrying many scars and hurts beyond imagination. Sexism is a world-wide, multi-cultural disgrace. Fundalmentalists and finatics are not exclusive to the Islam world. These atrocities made be condoned in Muslim countries, but they are not condoned by me, or other “feminist” Westerners. There, I said the “f…….” word. A dirty word in our culture. I’m am pro-life and human rights are needed for both men and women. The way these extremists are held accountable in our country is affected by the overall abuse of human rights within our home of the free. I speak from personal trials, George. Decent Americans will not justify “honor killings.” Remember, that in our history we burned some women at the stake, and their sympathizers. Nobody was ever prosecuted. Let’s unite in putting these “honor killers” in prison where they belong. Agree?
Thank you for writing this important article. This is an issue that just rips at my heart. People are choosing to ignore the treatment of women in the muslim world. They have plenty of info for them to be aware! So those who don’t care about this or claim ignorance have chosen an action. No action is still action. Just a shameful one in this case.
I really don’t want to go off topic, but as someone who was born and raised in the deep south I must respond to Mr Thomson. I’m betting you are from the East or West coast. Try to get past the burden of colonial (white) guilt. I know it got the current president elected, but it doesn’t solve any real problems. Work permits and various other legal means of entering our country are available. This is how so many Muslims are here. They can afford them. It is not because they have freckles.
Very few Muslim women have a way to escape the daily torture of life in their coutries. They can not leave their homes without a male escort. They have no money, and very limited education of their own. Even if our nation opened it’s arms to these women, most don’t see themselves as victims. The abuse is an intrinsic part of their culture.
It will be interesting to see reactions to the trial of the man who be-headed his wife. Clearly, this is an example of a culture that must not be allowed to thrive in the USA.
Dear Phyllis
Please don’t despair. You are doing a wonderful job in your writing and in your meeting with modern secular Muslim women.
There are several separate, though occasionally overlapping problems:
1. Making modern immigrant Muslim women (and men) aware of the problem and willing to at least discuss ways of correcting it.
2. Making modern secular Western men and women aware of the problem and willing to at least discuss ways of correcting it.
3. Finding ways of protecting Western civilization from the scourge of political correctness and its dhimmi attitudes towards Islam and religious fanatics whose appearance and speech signal “the other”.
4. Finding ways of protecting those Muslim women (and men) who wish to escape the horrors of honour killings and other aspects of an oppressive culture.
5. Keeping ourselves from despair and from empty rage.
Norman
I have no respect for a “religion” that allows the slavery of women. Any such “religion” is a lie, a blatant tool to keep women in their places. Those women who have escaped, good for you. But not good that they have nothing to do with their sisters, who would need their leadership . There are no heras amongts them except Aayan Hirsi Ali.
The Shari law is ridiculous. Killing a woman for being herslef? Stoning women to death? Barbaric and sick in the heart.
I praise my sister Phyllis Chgesler, for her brave act, a solo voice against such powers that make white people cringe. But my amazon sister, she stands tall. Roar on Phyllis, wake up thre women to action!
Far too many people believe if we treat our enemy nice they will treat us nice back.Not so.
My heart bleeds at every story I hear and read of the deep suffering that is committed against Muslim women by non other than their own. The blatant slavery, the un-usual cruelty…I’m so sick of everyone trying to convince me that these are all rare occurrences. They dismiss very new outrageous step that is taken to imprison and torture women for life. Everyone is so afraid of pointing out or criticizing this open policy of slavery and torturous existence the Muslim women is born in to, in most Muslim countries and yes…even here in the West. The so called educated and enlightened (especially men) frustrate and sadden me the most. How does one Condon such suffering by denying what so obviously is…obvious.