5 Things Women Do That Secretly Annoy Men
Ladies, have you ever had a person that you care about but he has this annoying habit that grinds your nerves?
Since you’re an open and honest human being, you want to talk to him about it, but the one time you alluded to it before, he got all huffy about it. Now, you don’t want to bring it up because you’re thinking it’ll turn into this whole, big thing. So, since he’s a great person, you just ignore it even though you really wish he’d stop doing it. Well, it just may be possible that you’re doing something very similar to some of the men in your life. Too harsh? Okay, maybe not YOU, but your loud friend, you know — the one that doesn’t have a lot of tact? She may be doing some of these things and by reading this article, you may be able to help her with things like…
1) If you don’t want us to fix it, why did you bring it up?
When men have a problem, we like to figure out how to deal with it so that it frees our thought processes up for debates about who the greatest home run hitter of all time is (Babe Ruth) or whether you’d be more likely to catch a venereal disease from Paris Hilton or Snooki (Snooki). So, if two men are talking and one says to the other, “My boss is being a real jerk. I’ve had a vacation on the schedule for three months, but he’s asking me to work next weekend. It’s not even an important job! Anybody could do it!” he’s hoping to get a solution to his problem.
Is there a way to save his vacation? Should he quit his job? What should he say to his boss?
This is why men tend to be mildly irritated when a woman talks about an issue and just seems to want him to commiserate. “Oh, I can’t BELIEVE she said that to you about your dress! Who does that ratty b*tch think she is?” These comments don’t lead to getting anything done. So, we can pretend to sympathize, but we’ll be biting our lip to keep from explaining what to do the whole time.
Look brother, you seem like a real nice guy, so please don’t be personally insulted, but these kind of articles are boring and tiresome. Yep, women talk a lot – how many times must we shoot that dead horse? I realize that it’s meant to be a light-hearted piece, but there are a hell of a lot of women out there that are nothing like what you just described. And I’d hazard to guess that most of your female PJM readers bear little resemblance to 90% of the stereotypes described in this article. I can’t speak for the male readership here, but I have a feeling they’re the kind of guys that tend to choose wives and girlfriends that don’t fit the stereotypical mold either. Maybe you’re just dating the wrong women?
These articles get read. PJM is actually kind of brilliant for pushing them. Props to you Hawkins.
News Flash “Maturity Man”: Stereotypes are based on reality, albeit distorted and simplistic thereof. Guess what? Even the “exceptionl” women you tout fall into these patterns, and often. It’s like some kind of biological determinism.
I agree. PJM seems to have lost it’s edge as a place for conservative commentary. And not surprisingly, I’m spending less and less time here.
a) statistically the difference in words used per day for men and women is insignificant – both are roughly at 16k. The outliers were men (most words per day).
b) yes, I’m also getting tired of these articles – not the ‘lifestyle’ ones per se, but the ones that are chock full of gender-stereotypes – often regarding women.
That’s not what he said.
YOU’RE NOT LISTENING, DEAR….
E2,
Try getting the AOL/HuffPO mix. The one I get when I log into AOL. Half the website is nothing but how to change your man, 15 things you should worry about but didn’t know till we told you, and how some woman got victimized by patriarchal society, etc. The feminism oozes from it’s pages. Every day there is an article about things men should know/do better/ignore about women.
So, it’s kind of nice to see an article about what women should/should not do with respect to men. P.S. You don’t have to read if it’s so bothersome.
(I actually had a thermonuclear argument over the toilet seat for suggesting that women quit using BS safety arguments and acting like they have some moral high ground, and ask as a favor instead of demanding as an edict. So yes, I find this article enjoyable).
Well said,brother. About the whole toilet seat thing…I’ve always wondered how come women can’t put the damn thing down themselves? Is it going to break your arms or something? I grew up in a house with 5 other guys. The toilet was NEVER in an immediately usable state every time I had to use the bathroom,out of the many things I fought with my other male family and extended family over, the toilet was never one of them,and we fought over some pretty stupid stuff.
Have to agree. This article reflects far more on the author than on women.
A funny article could be written on the topic, but this is not the one.
Those of you who don’t like these articles (I enjoy them) – guess what, you can tell what they are by the title! And then you can – not read them!
forget one. Women remember way too much. If you didn’t do something 20 years ago, you’ll still hear about it.
“…there are a hell of a lot of women out there that are nothing like what you just described.”
No there aren’t. Read the comments below yours for evidence.
In about half of this, the situation is reversed in may case. I still liked the article.
Sweetie, when an activity continues, its not “a dead horse”. Hint: Stop it! Try to be efficient in communication. If you can tell it in ten words, don’t use 100.
Identifying a problem, then walking away from it is stupid.Self pity is disgusting. Fixation on the miniscule even worse.Airheaded conduct is repulsive.Whether on the part of males or females, the above described conducts are not viable, but destructive.
Few men are rational. No women are. If rationality is an essential for a relationship, there are few possibles. Ah, well…
The only mistake here is the word “secretly”. And of course these are strereotypes, but as long as the MSM continues its misandrism – and doesn’t even acknowledge that there is such a thing – we need a counterweight.
Actually, sounds like “the rules”. Most women find them funny.
(Only the woman knows the rules. If the man find out what any of the rules are, they will be changed. Etc….)
Look…men talk just as much as women do and yes, there’s a war on men, and no one cares about toilet seats.
Next!
If you sincerely believe the first of those claims, you’ve been hanging around the wrong men. If you sincerely believe the second one…you did call yourself a “mom,” didn’t you?
I don’t mind that men talk too much, actually. And yes, I am a mom trying my best to raise my boys well. Are you implying that moms are waging war on men?
Look…men talk just as much as women do
No we don’t. Only 3-8 % of men are gay. Other than gays, men who talk as much as women do are known as sports color commentators, and are paid handsomely for doing something so unnatural.
Something has happened to the American male. In my experience, many of the biggest chatterboxes I know are younger males, in their teens, twenties, thirties and forties, and a large proportion of these are not gay.
I’m a Baby Boomer, but I’m trying hard not to be guilty of generational snobbery. Lord knows, we’ve got more than enough sins of our own.
…you are trying to be funny, right?
Seriously, the biggest talkers I know are straight men. One of them in particular is good for 20-30 minutes of continuous entertainment if you bring up one of his numerous hot-button topics.
If I tell my husband a problem, I appreciate greatly that he listens. He will offer a solution if he has one, but the fact that he isn’t playing the stereotypical ‘shut up, you dumb woman’ male makes me appreciate him all the more. And if he has something on his mind I listen and offer help if I have it.
We don’t have time for bashing each other with stereotypes- we love each other, and have a lot of challenges to get through. (we’re small business owners, need I say more?) And our recent 25th anniversary should indicate we’re doing something right!
Conservatives are wasting a lot of energy on arguments like this. The rise of womens’ rights did not make all of us evil emasculating b******.
If you resent your spouse or the women you know as much as some of the commenters here appear to, the problem may not be all them….
HA HA! Funny.
In my house the men definitely talk too much, but only to me. I think it’s because my husband is surrounded by idiots all day and the boys know mom thinks everything they do is wonderful. Which is what moms are supposed to think, after all.
#3, the toilet seat thing; It would take less effort to simply pull it down than to put it up. I suggest telling her to put it up when she is done with it as that is the preferable status for most male use. That or I dunno, maybe pay attention and take the extra fraction of a second to apply the tiny amount of effort to put it down and then don’t complain about it.
There is no need to opine about the toilet seat problem; the science is settled:
http://www.scq.ubc.ca/a-game-theoretic-approach-to-the-toilet-seat-problem/
And yes, I’m one of those women who has a more pronounced left-brain bias than 95% of men; I became an economist, married an economist, and our dinner conversation is usually about as dry and analytical as that paper. We divide household tasks based on Ricardo’s theory of comparative advantage, and make joint spending decisions after breaking down the ROI. The only intractable argument we have is which one of us designs better spreadsheets.
You’re actually married to Sheldon from “The Big Bang Theory?”
Fascinating!
No, they’re both Sheldon. I’m jealous; I wish I knew how to do that.
p = probability the man is doing #1 vs #2.
p = 2/3?? Really? 5/6 or 7/8 is a much better estimate, isn’t it?
And why can’t the woman leave the seat up, say, 1/4 times she uses it? It’s never been done before? We need a constitutional amendment or something.
Wow!
Brilliant and funny link.
“Criterion (2) seems plausible. It requires, however, that Marsha put the seat in the up position after performing a toilet operation some percentage of the time. No instance of this behaviour has ever been observed in recorded history; ergo this criterion can be ruled out. (But see remark 6.)”
Although in my case, the shower I use (but my wife does not) has no curtain between it and the seat, so I have to put the seat UP before I shower (and hopefully remeber to put it down after).
Home Depot, Lowe’s and other hardware stores really should just start carrying modified-for-the-home versions of those public restroom toilet seats — the ones with the opening in front to allow the seat to stay down while a guy with any sense of accuracy at all can stand and relieve himself without sprinkling the seat. A rounded one to match most home commodes would probably look inelegant, but it would be an option to solve a century-old crisis.
Maybe sprinkling the seat IS the answer.
Sort of like spraying the cat when it claws at the furniture?
We have a winner!
Men are more interested in solutions than in problems. Here is a solution, straightforward, elegant (in its own limited way), and, in retrospect, obvious. The best kind.
I leave it down all the time. If I happen to miss and get the seat wet, so what? The seat is down, right?? That’s what’s important, right??
There is one correct answer to this problem. Both the seat and the lid should be down when not in use.
Leave the seat up and flush the toilet with your hand where the seat rests. When your hand gets wet from toilet spray think about how much you like the idea of that spray getting over everything in the bathroom each time the toilet is flushed. Including your toothbrush.
Also when the seat and lid are down you can’t accidentally drop your cell phone into the toilet.
You are male?
I just put the BOTH the lid AND the toilet seat down. It solved the argument about whether putting the toilet seat down was ‘for her’.
I told her it made the bathroom look nicer when friends (always hers) come over.
She was ecstatic that I thought of her!
Problem solved!
Men need to be house broken and trained early in the marriage or relationship.
That’s because Women don’t want to touch the toilet seat (germs. It’s enough we wash and buy your underwear for you!
Neither do men. That’s the point.
All it took was for me to “sit” on the cat once, and I’ve never left the seat up again!
My girlfriend got unnecessarily pissed off at me when I introduced my solution to the toilet seat debate. I tried to explain that it doesn’t really matter, that it all goes to the same place. I explained that it was more efficient because nobody had to waste energy moving the seat up or down. But she was having none of it. She even threw something at me, a can of comet, I think. Talk about an explosive overreaction. Apparently, urinating in the sink is “barbaric” and doing it makes me a “sick sonofab*tch”. Sheesh, was that really necessary? Needless to say, she didn’t react well to my inquiring about her midol, or making light of her similarities with her mother.
Now I can leave the seat up all I want, and I don’t have to worry about “Say Yes to the Dress” filling up my TiVo. I do sometimes miss home cooked meals, though.
Wow. Your girlfriend insults you with swears and throws cans of dangerous chemicals at your head over a little disagreemnet, and you’re still with her?! Now that’s pathetic.
Oops, I think missed the last part – sorry.
Esther Vilar, The Manipulated Man; originally published in the late 60s/early 70s, it’s still in print and still very relevant.
When it originally came out, it created a firestorm. Read it and you’ll see why.
I bought into Women’s Lib in the Sixties because it was said to be Men’s Lib too.
As a general rule, those of us who did were blindsided in the Seventies and Eighties.
I’m still a liberated man, but I’m no longer surprised about where Feminism wound up.
Yes, a very illuminating book. A real intellectual hand grenade, as radical as the old “Games People Play”.
Married for 29 years. I told my wife early on that I’m not a mind reader. If I could read minds, I wouldn’t be working here. I’d be cleaning up at the poker tables in Vegas instead.
Women would rest a lot easier if they realized that men are just as simple as we seem.
Just because I may do something differently than the way you do it, it doesn’t automatically mean that my way is wrong.
Been married almost thirty years to the same woman, the love of my life, but even that doesn’t make me an expert on female communication techniques. The mind-reader thing, though, is spot on.
An elementary example: if a husband wants a wife to buy some beer at the grocery store on her next visit, he asks, “Sweetie, would you please buy some beer next time you’re at the grocery store?”
But if a wife wants the same thing from her husband, she simply states, “There are only two beers in the ‘fridge.”
Now, an experienced husband who is awake and alert knows that his wife is really presenting a request that has taken the form of a proposition. But the truth of the matter is that not all husbands are 100% alert all the time, particularly if they played any part in reducing the number of beers in the fridge to two.
This is the way women communicate. She wants her husband to infer the request from the proposition. Yes, they’re testing us. All of the time. They are in constant need of reassurance that we are attuned to all implications and ramifications of even the most neutral- and mundane-sounding statements.
And it can upset them when we don’t interpret correctly.
There must be a reason why this is so. Maybe many ages of being treated as chattel has bred into them this seemingly indirect path to getting what they want. Good question, perhaps, for a psychologist or anthropologist.
Your typical husband, however, is not an -ologist of any sort and is just trying to avoid a spat. So, he should train himself to recognize the hidden meaning of every wifely remark. Sorry, that’s impossible — I mean, at least to recognize that there is a hidden meaning, even if he has no clue what it may be.
See? I told you men talk too much.
Are you a married mom of two boys?
No, I’m divorced. I left him because he wouldn’t stop talking.
Auntie Ho smelled something funny.
YES!
> See? I told you men talk too much.
It goes without saying. Whenever a woman doesn’t like what a man has to say, by definition, the man talks too much.
You just proved my point by saying something that ‘goes without saying.’ Just can’t help yourself, can you?
(yawn) “Yesss, dearrrr.” (belch)
“There are only two beers in the ‘fridge.”
Fine, next time you’re out pick some up.
My husband would say, “We need to get some beer next time we’re out.”
Which is funny, because he does approximately 0.1% of all the shopping, and I do 99.9%, so who is this “we” he’s talking about?
In my house, it pretty much comes down to if I remember when I’m at the store, I’ll pick it up. If I don’t, we don’t get it, and he lives without it.
Told my wife-to-be that I wasn’t a mind reader and neither she nor God were gonna make me one after we got married. Had to remind her only a few times since.
The toilet seat issue has never come up, but the solution is simple: if they’re so intellectually superior and intuitive, why are they failing to detect the state of the toilet seat?
Intellectually speaking, the easy all around fair solution is to keep the LID down at all times! My intuition told me that flushing causes a fine mist of toilet water grossness to spray up and around the bathroom landing on toothbrushes and towels. Once my husband realized that my intuition was right on, I can now claim that the state of my toilet seat and lid are always in the down position after use. Now can we move on to which way the toilet paper should roll out?
“…which way the toilet paper should roll out?”
Ha! Yes, thank you for raising this! It’s one of life’s self-evident truths that the roll should be placed so that it is pulled from over the top.
Why anyone intentionally would install the roll to be pulled from the bottom, which often requires a search for that hidden end of the roll, is a great mystery. Imagine all those half-seconds of time which we have wasted over the years trying to find that hidden end!
You don’t have a cat, do you?
He’s a man, so by definition he doesn’t have a pestering, fur ball, puking four legged, auto spraying flea carrier…
A lot of the problem comes down to the general idea that men are hunters and women are gatherers.
Think about it. When I want a hammer I go to the hardware store and buy a hammer. I don’t buy a jigsaw or a drill. I buy a hammer. I am directed and specific in my tactics.
Hunting is a directed, specific activity. The tactics and actions required to hunt deer and elephant are different, so that when I go hunting I am going with a specific target in mind.
Women are gatherers. There is no specific set of tactics; gathering requires a more open set of actions. You may go out looking for an oregano bush, but when there is a basil tree next to it, you get some of both. Women shop. This is why a woman goes out to buy a pair of shoes and comes home with shoes, a blouse, a skirt, and a blender. They gather.
Men are directed. Women are flighty. It is what it is.
That little screed, Sir, was an insult to women, and also quite accurate.
Ragnar hits it on the head. My wife loathes this analogy, but she cannot disprove it and never tries.”Sour Mouthed Disgust” only partially describes her reaction.
My trips to the mall take minutes and end suddenly, and with satisfaction.If IT is not there, there is always ‘The Fabled Net’, which is where you can always get what you need…..
Hers are the exact opposite and are seemingly never ending. If she goes with a Female relative, especially her Blood-Nieces, write off the entire day, no matter when she claims she is ‘coming home’.
??”Do you need anything online?” Catalog submitted, order in, takes 15 minutes, tops. Do not ask how long she takes, I stopped caring years ago.
Grocery stores? Since becoming unemployed I have become somewhat
of a “Grocery Expert”, to the point of having various stores’ layouts ‘in memory’. An hour gets me ‘bounties unimaginable’.
But if/when She goes, it means squat. Gotta look,feel,touch,sniff and twice-examine every fricken thing extant, needed or not, listed or not.
After a while, just recognize this for what it is: Genetic and Hard-Wired. Period.
I use this one all the time. Especially concerning shopping.
Men are hunters. We kill something with meat to eat. We shoot the first thing that foots the bill. I don’t need to shoot the best deer in the forest, just a deer that satisfies my needs.
Women are gatherers. They need to look at all the bushes and all the berries. Some are better than others and they want the best ones. Which also explains why women will crowd in to look at whatever your wife is looking at in the store – she might have found some good berries!
I wrote on precisely this subject some years back in an article titled, Men Are Hunters – Women Are Berrypickers. You might find the article interesting.
Many men find it amusing. Many women do not, but among those who do notI have found that it’s because it’s too close to true for their comfort.
http://www.wildwestcycle.com/f_select.html
Dude, you nailed it on every subject.
I’m a woman and I agree with your assessment. And I’m not a bit insulted by it. My husband chuckles at, but appreciates my gathering abilities, especially when there’s an extra tube of toothpaste under the sink. The logical way to deal with all of this is to appreciate the strengths of the other gender, get out of the way and let them do what they do best. Vive la difference!
Yes, but you’re making the common mistaken assumption that all primitive tribal people enjoy Spaghetti Bolognese – please don’t stereotype.
Him: you are the love of my life, the woman I chose above all others to marry and spend my life with. I can see something is wrong. What is it? How can I help?
Her: If you really loved me you would know what’s wrong. If I have to tell you it doesn’t count.
Implied: no matter what’s wrong, it’s his fault for not reading her mind and making it all better. So she retaliates in all those little nasty ways that a woman is so expert at.
Repeat often enough and he will eventually come to believe that anyone who treats him in this fashion could not possibly love him, so why is he wasting his life with such a person. Sometimes he finds someone who does appreciate him, and sometimes he just runs away, legally or otherwise.
You’ve obviously been involved with emotionally stunted and/or manipulative women. Poor guy!
There’s a bunch of them around.
I ran…
Never been happier! Found Wife 2.0. A HUGE improvement.
well, my biggest pet peeve with my wife involves (not so) secretly shutting the windows every night then complaining when my side of the bed is drenched in sweat each morning
Your wife clearly needs to frame the problem a little differently:
“I can wear this little skimpy thing if it’s nice and warm in here, or my flannel PJs if the window is open. You decide, dear.”
Regarding #3.
Men & Boys. Put the damn seat UP. ESPECIALLY in public restrooms that women don’t use. Nobody is interested in sharing toilet space with your overspray. And women, if you’re so blasted strong and independent, then take responsibility for managing your own bodily functions.
Men are smart enough to look at the seat BEFORE sitting down. Or is this toilet seat thing all about getting men to accomodate the stupidity, weakness and irresponsibility of women?
It’s also the case that if the seat is always down, what you see when it does come up is usually more than just pristine porcelain, if you know what I mean. Hey women, we have to see that when we go and it’s disgusting. Just keep it clean, everybody.
And, Suk-Yo therapy really works! Press hard with your right forefinger or use a stick, and do clockwise circles into your left palm, pressing tightly. This will relieve the urge to defecate. Counter-clockwise relieves constipation. Try it, it works.
Do you also know if you say the word gullible slow enough it sounds just like orange?
When doing a traditionally woman’s task there is only one way to do it – her way.
However, when doing a traditionally man’s task, there is always room for female interpretation.
In a shared task, again there is only one way to do it – her way.
Also, when you screw up doing one of her chores, it’s because you’re a idiot and weren’t listening. If she screws up doing one of your chores, it’s because you didn’t explain it right and should have done it in the first place.
I could go on all day.
Ooooookay. Next time I take a leak, I don’t pick up the seat before hand.
Seriously, though, men have to look before every time they use the toilet. And, as far as I’m concerned, only an idiot sits down without looking first. Just a smart habit that keeps hats, cats, dogs, stuff in shirt pockets, etc uncrushed, not to mention sharp and pointy stuff, and toilet seats that are up.
3. The seat is supposed to remain UP.
That’s why there’s a hinge on it. Down for sitting use. Up for stand by.
Guys, just leave it down and pee on it a couple of times. She’ll learn.
Wow. Lotta rage. I predict a difficult marriage in your future.
The toilet seat issue is easily solved: get yourselves a couple of cats or small dogs. You’ll be forced to leave down both seat and lid so that they don’t drink out of the bowl. What really grosses me out, guys, is when there is that little puddle on the floor in front of the toilet. I realize it is difficult to aim correctly in the middle of the night or on a airplane . . . but really. Yuck!
#1 is a big one for us. Sometimes I preface a comment or story with, “I don’t want you to solve this or do anything, I just want to tell you . . . ”
#2 is totally not an issue. My husband works 80-hr weeks. My job is easy compared to that and I try to pick up the slack around the house.
“I realize it is difficult to aim correctly in the middle of the night or on a airplane”
It would be almost impossible for you to have the slightest conception of what’s involved.
My wife left me when I was 32, back on 6-4-1987. What I thought was the worst day of my life, in time, turned out quite well! No Woman No Cry!
1. Women are soothers; men are fixers. It’s in our DNA.
2. I can work all day, cook dinner (yes, I can cook), do the dishes,the vacuuming, and the laundry, and when finished, I would never even consider saying, “Not tonight, dear. I’m too tired!”
3. One can only hope that the location of a toilet seat is the biggest problem you have in your relationship!
4. It isn’t the talking. It’s the fact that they want you to look at them when you’re doing so. Two men can spend hours together, carry on a running dialogue, and never look at each other even once. For men, getting “face-to-face” is confrontational. If you want to talk to us and know that we are listening, do so while we are driving, where we have the excuse of watching the road instead of you. DO NOT, however, take that opportunity to tell us you’re pregnant!!
5. No solution to that one. Instead of “We’re getting low on milk,” my wife likes to wait until I get home from the store to say “Didn’t you see we needed milk!”
If a man says something and there is no woman around to hear what he said, is he still wrong?
Of course he is. If he says anything other than “yes, dear”, women like motherf2boys will claim he talks too much.
She’s not incorrect, you know. I know lots of men who consistantly use 250 words where 5 will do.
And quite a few women complain that men talk too much as a tactic to shut down speech they disagree with.
I have no interest in shutting down speech I disagree with, that’s a total cop out. Yes, some men are silent types but they’re the exception. Men do talk too much, they just don’t realize it because they’re talking about what they consider guy stuff.
Given the volume of your posts, it could just as easily be said that you talk too much complaining about men talking too much.
Yeah, I talk too much. Hah!
Here is what I hate. My wife goes to some conference. When she gets home, I sit down & ask about it. She tells me a couple of basics & immediately picks up her cell phone. The next day I’m driving & she is in the car w/ one of her girl friends. She spends the next 45 minutes going over in great detail every aspect of the conference. I turn to her & say, “why didn’t you tell me that?” She replies, “You didn’t ask.” Head slap…
“Ask him … what his favorite sexual fantasy is and you’ll have trouble getting him to shut up.”
Bad advice. Even if she is “just curious”, she may not like the answer and it will escalate into an arguement.
The toilet seat thing is easy. All toilets come with a two part cover. Seat and lid. They should always be down when not being used (sorry Rover). Then both sexes are required to both lift and shut something. Easy.
Thomas_L,
You must not have gotten the “hurt myself in the dark in middle of the night” safety argument. (which all women seem to have problems with, because EVERY SINGLE ONE of them uses this argument in the toilet seat debate!). And every woman is vested in this argument whether you already put the seat down for her or not. It’s like she’s arguing for all womanhood, whether she is personally affected or not.
Here’s the argument. If the toilet seat is up, the woman falls in because it’s dark, can’t see whether the seat is down. Can’t turn on the light because it’ll wake her up too much. If lid is down, the woman hits her butt hard on lid because she can’t see it’s down. But if the seat, and the seat only, is down, she can successfully (and safely) plop her butt down in the darkness without injury.
Of course, the man can feel around the toilet in the dark, pick up the lid, do his business, and find the up seat in the dark and put it back down. He doesn’t risk losing balance in the dark trying to find the seat, he is fully functional (unlike the woman, it seems). Or he can turn on the light. That’s the choices for men.
The argument is about some “right” that women have declared for themselves, all their arguments are completely selfish. And I will go to my grave, knowing this is true. BTW, I put the seat down because I am considerate of my gal, not because of the ridiculous arguments.
Well, you’re right of course. I just kind of figured this is a good compromise. Shared responsibility and all that.
You left out a very important 6th thing women do that drive men insane:
When a man asks a question that requires a quantitative answer….like, for example, “How long does it take you to drive to work?”
PLEASE PLEASE, ladies, give the answer FIRST before you launch off into a 20 minute dissertation on the endless details of this drive. I love hearing the story – I want to hear the story…
But can you please just give us the answer first?
A good man does his job, accepts his resposibilities, keeps his word,and takes care of the people who depend on him.
The common factor in all of these is responsibility – you do what you should do whether you feel like it or not. If we’re not supposed to act on our feelings, why the hell would we want to talk about about them ?
And tomorrow, PJ Media will run “Should you take your cat to a Psychiatrist?” “101 new shoes women will love!” “Get rid of that Embarassing Belly Fat” and “55 Things Bloggers Love to Natter on about that are Totally Uninteresting.”
I remember when PJ media was a real blog.
Ladies, if you want it fixed, tell your guy. If you just want a sounding board, tell your girlfriend, priest or shrink.
A big problem for me is to remember that, when my wife complains about something, she is NOT looking for a solution, but for comfort.
I have lost track of the number of times that forgetting this has created, um, “issues” for me.
Rather than get upset that we attempt to solve every problem presented to us, women should understand that we are wired for solving problems and that our willingness to solve their problems is the indicator of how much we care about them. We don’t solve just any woman’s problems. Part of becoming a man is realizing that there are selfish, mean-spirited women out there who will exploit our problem-solving with a little false interest – a flip of the hair, a stroke of the ego, a little extra swing in the hips. (“I just don’t understand this calculus problem – humph!” or “Will you help me change my headlight, pretty please?” or “Open this jar” or “Throw your back out lifting this purse”, etc) The key thing women should remember is that we solve their problems because we love them. So when you talk about the women you can’t stand, don’t be upset or offended when we begin explaining what you should say to get rid of them or put them in their place.
It’s not like we have a choice, either. We have a compulsion to investigate and solve every problem, emergency, or crisis that arises.
Also, ladies, don’t expect sympathy from us when you misplace your ID or your card or your cell phone. We know why you lost them – that enormous purse you lug around lulls you into a false sense of security with personal effects. Men have developed a system for storing and tracking these important tools. If you watch a man dismounting his relaxation throne in front of the hypnosis box, you can sometimes catch a glimpse of this special ritual. It is the pocket tap. It can come in two, three, or four pocket varieties, depending on the activity he is about to embark on. This method of organizing his personal toolkit allows him to walk around without anything in his hands and still have everything he needs short of a mild emergency. This is why the male gets so frustrated with being asked to hold the bag of arbitrary garbage you haven’t used since you put it in there just after purchasing said bag.
Indeed, sir, you know women!
But remember, they don’t mean nuthin’ by it!
American men should get a copy of the Vilar book mentioned in my #4 above.
Female chauvinism is alive and well.
Back in the day, Vilar was a European feminist (IIRC, old-school Argentine of German extraction) who was slamming her American sisters for trying to appeal to ordinary women for support in the cause. Vilar said, they will never, ever support you because they won’t want to give up what they’ve got.
The typical American wife of my generation was fully-accustomed to being able to wrap the husband around her little finger through manipulation.
Those traditional women screamed to high heaven when Vilar’s book was published here in America.
It . was . treason .
Still . is .
Look, if we are all honest, we would admit we are curious about these articles. It is not stupid to research ideas about the opposite sex if we can learn more about each other and lessen the arguments that come about from our different perspectives. I for one like to read these type articles because I find them not only interesting, but often times humorous. It is okay to stray away from those polarizing events to peek into another opinion about each other. Having said that, I would interject that just letting a man be a man would be the benfit for all involved. Sure men have their moments that women find irritating, but letting a man be a man instead of some made up fairy tale, you might find out that you like them more than you don’t.
Reasonable articles like this are a gateway drug. Soon John Hawkins will be going over the finer points of Game, advice on how to properly apply a Don Draper backhand, the best weightlifing regimen and fitness regimen, and how to properly troll liberals online.
Punch!
I read Vilar’s book way back in the early 80s. After what Zorba characterized as “the full catastrophe”.
Apparently she is still around, and proudly stated that she still gets the occasional death threat.
BTW the “Stop Talking” photo made my day!
Okay, number 4 perfectly explains the gender gap for Mitt Romney, and the marriage gap between married women and single women.
Maybe single women are still single because they still think men will eventually talk about their feelings… and they are still searching for the guy who will talk long into the night about how deeply they feel things… well that guy is gay ladies, and if that is the guy you are looking for to marry…don’t.
I have been married over 30 years. I get why Mitt doesn’t talk that much about feelings and when he does he looks awkward. He is a real man, not steeped in years of politics. He probably never will discuss the deepness of his feelings. You have to read his mind… or actions. Which women should be better at than men. Put your mind to it, ladies and you will catch on.
Your husband is lucky. You seem a right broad.
No accolade is higher.
Men and women are different. I’ve rather enjoyed the differences thru the years.
I feel like I just read a Yahoo article. I wish I could get my minutes back.
Yes, we men often leave the toilet seat up, but women often leave the lid up. Both the seat and the lid should be lowered after use.
And while we’re discussing bathrooms, whose long hair is it that clogs the drains? It isn’t mine!
You people here are really cruel!
I still can’t stop laughing!
Women, God bless their poor little pea pickin’ hearts.
Wonderful article for the pics alone. However this should be a in a separate section from the newes blogs. Maybe PJ can start a “Love and Relationships” section.
Let me set the record straight:
I was raised by my four older sisters and a very smart Mom. I have been married to two excellent wives (the first died at a terribly early age). Either would have killed for me. Indeed, my present wife gave me one of her kidneys. What more could one ask?
There is much men could learn from women. We do not get most of it. We probably never will. But it has been thus for ever and ever. Nothing new to see here.
For instance, they are very clannish with other women, indeed, protective and supportive. I have alwsya called it the “sisterhood”. It is because they always distrust us, because they do not understand us, any better than we understand them. You must prove their trust.
Fellows: when women bitch, which they do, frequently, IT IS NEVER ABOUT WHAT THEY SAY IT IS! It is a female thing, beyond reason as we understand it.
A woman’s support system allows for just plain bitching. It is not specific. They just get in a bad mood and need to abuse someone. If you are their True Love, it’s you, stupid! That’s why they married you, fer chrissakes! If you really LOVE them, they can dump on you. Can’t you stand a little collateral damage, for you Own True Love? What kind of milk pussy are you?
Now, a small percentage of women ARE bitches! How do we know who’s who?
Try this: when she starts being way unreasonable, try not to take it personally. It’s probably NOT you, although she will pick on some stupid thing you did. Instead of arguing, just accept that you are now in the Twilight Zone, and no argument you can give will help the situation. It will merely destroy ypour voice yelling, and will only make her more unreasonable.
Contemplate what the word “husband” means. Protection is a key feature, even when she’s attacking you.
If she really loves you, it will blow over. Unless, of course, she really has an agenda without you in mind (if that’s so, why did she marry you?). But always bide your time. If she is a good person, it will blow over. If she’s not, there is not a damn thing you can do about it.
Misery will be you.
Nice post.
Tellingly, you’ll never see an article titled “[x] Things Men Do That Secretly Annoy Women.” For some reason I’ve never understood, women have a blank check to be OPENLY annoyed with men however/whenever it suits them.