CAN WE PLEASE STOP TALKING ABOUT 2028 ALREADY???

Sorry for shouting in the headline, but it had to be done.

Remember primal scream therapy? Dr. Arthur Janov was a California-based psychologist (of course) who in 1970 published an entire book, "The Primal Scream," arguing that yelling really loudly (and of course, primally) could help people recover from childhood traumas, neglect, frustration, etc. Janov passed away in 2017 at the ripe old age of 93, but the need to yell at stuff is eternal. 

I find my primal scream needs are much more immediate and less deep-rooted. I do the short version in my car all the time whenever someone in front of me makes a left turn from the right lane. You'd be surprised how often that happens. 

It's easy to make fun of all those silly ideas from the '70s that became surprisingly successful business ventures, like pet rocks, EST, and "The Love Boat." But there's something to be said for a primal scream now and then, particularly if you don't once bother to read Dr. Janov's book about it. Certain things are completely self-explanatory, like the release one enjoys from screaming at deeply stupid people.

But more primal-scream-worthy than jerk drivers are the pundits and pollsters already engaged in handicapping the 2028 presidential race.

And Another Thing: I can't be the only one who remembers NBC's extremely short-lived "Love Boat" ripoff, "Supertrain." They went light on the romance and bikini-clad guest stars and heavy on the badly scripted drama. What were they thinking?

So let me show you something, but first, you might want to cover your face with a pillow in case it makes you feel all primal-screamy. Just the mouth part of your face — you'll need your eyeballs. 

Here we go:

📊 2028 National Primary Polling

DEM
🔵 Harris 48%
🔵 AOC 15%
🔵 Newsom 10%
🔵 Shapiro 9%
🔵 Whitmer 6%
🔵 Moore 3%
🔵 Smith 2%
——
GOP
🔴 Vance 36%
🔴 Trump Jr. 31%
🔴 DeSantis 13%
🔴 Ramaswamy 6%
🔴 Rubio 6%@overtoninsights | 3/24-28 | RVshttps://t.co/SV7NzH42N2 pic.twitter.com/Eo6dc7fsW0

— InteractivePolls (@IAPolls2022) April 7, 2025

This is a real poll — likely voters, a margin of error, cross-tabs, the works. But it's still a shout-worthy pile of nonsense because what it doesn't have is any actual candidates running in any actual races. This so-called "national primary polling" effort is nothing more than "Names that registered voters are pretty sure they recognize, possibly even in the context of running for president."

The "news" here is no more informative than when I let my three crazy dogs in from the yard and ask, "Who wants a treat?" 

Tails wag, drool oozes. 

"All three of you? AGAIN?"

It isn't just this one poll, or it wouldn't make me want to shout so loudly. An early riser, I grab my first cup of coffee on my way to my desk at around 5 a.m. and begin scanning the headlines. 

So many headlines just like these:

• 2028 presidential race: A face-off between a current and former vice president?
• Welcome to CNN's 2028 Presidential Bracket
• Trump Heir Already Doomed

I made up that last one, but you can hardly tell.

This once, though, my frustration isn't the media's fault — or at least not entirely their fault. The 2028 potential Democrat contenders probably put their exploratory teams to work just as soon as Kamala Harris was given the 2024 nomination as a participation trophy/boat anchor by a vengeful Joe Biden. 

So you can hardly blame Democrats like Sen. Cory Booker (D-New Jersey) for sticking a toe in the presidential water. I'm kidding about Booker, of course. He waded in up to his belly button with that not-a-real-fillibuster last week — and you can thank me later for cleaning up the anatomical reference. 

But we can sure as heck blame the legacy dinosaur media for playing along and reporting pure speculation as real news.

It's enough to make you want to scream.

Recommended: Trump Is the Bull in China's Shop

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