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Getting to the Bottom of #PoopyPantsBiden: Did POTUS Really Poop Himself in Front of the Pope?

Social media exploded over the weekend with #PoopyPantsBiden claims that Presidentish Joe Biden might have suffered from loose bowels during his Thursday meeting with Pope Francis.

Conservative Twitter humorist Catturd had a field day with the hot mess, using his large following to get #PoopyPantsBiden to trend on the woke platform.

While I’m not privy to exactly how this got started, the rumor mill began to swirl with this tweet from Nevada-based conservative commentator Amy Tarkanian on Saturday:

The Spectator’s Damian Thompson chimed in that he had “heard this from an excellent source.” Donald Trump Jr. tweeted, “Zero chance this didn’t happen.”

Much to my dismay, associated hashtags #Poopgate and #Shartweek seem to have failed to trend.

Not that tweeters didn’t try to push that message out.



Oof.

I’m not even going to post some of the nastier photoshops and memes. If you need to see those, you’ll have to take care of that business yourself.

Also for our VIPs: American Mengele

What I haven’t been able to find in all the fun is any confirmation from a first-hand source or the mainstream media. Then again, given the security surrounding both a U.S. president and a pope, there wouldn’t be a first-hand source that would dare reveal such a foul nugget of news. And since the mainstream media is our modern-day Praetorian Guard, alternately selecting and propping up our decadent emperors, they wouldn’t tell even if they knew.

Curiously, at the last minute on Thursday, the Vatican canceled the planned live television broadcast of him greeting and meeting with the alleged American president.

Celebrity news site Meaww let loose with this reminder:

This is not the first time the leader of the free world has faced such accusations. Many believe that Biden couldn’t help himself during his meeting with British Prime Minister Boris Johnson on September 22, and therefore White House staff cut Johnson mid-sentence and asked the news media to leave immediately.

Also courtesy of Twitter is a nearly-forgotten 4Chan thread that was supposedly written by a Bernie Bro who worked as a low-level staffer for the Biden campaign last summer. The author claimed that “Biden is in the early stages of dementia, and is on medication for it.” However, the medication, Namenda, has “unfortunate side effects” that have “made Joe incontinent.”

Another common side effect of Namenda is persistent coughing, which we’ve all seen Biden do a lot. Add the two together, and maybe there’s truth to the rumors that Afghanistan wasn’t Biden’s most recent unplanned evacuation.

Snopes logged an entry in Biden’s defense, if that helps you make up your mind in one way or the number two way.

But the reality is that we might never know the truth.

And in this case, would you really want to?

I guess it Depends.