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Irony Alert: Dr. Fauci Is the Most Effective Anti-Vaxxer Ever

AP Photo/Susan Walsh

Celebrity medical spokesmodel Anthony “Doctor” Fauci was back on MSNBC on Sunday to tout the benefits of getting vaccinated against COVID-19, such as still not being allowed to do anything.

Wait, what?

It’s true.

Now that the most vulnerable have been vaccinated in huge numbers, MSNBC host Mehdi Hasan asked Fauci, “Drinking indoors, restaurants, and bars. Is that OK now?”

“It’s still not OK for vaccinated Americans to eat and drink indoors.”

The only explanation that makes any sense to me is that Fauci is actually a closet anti-vaxxer determined to keep people from getting vaccinated.

On the air, Fauci urged people to “please get vaccinated as soon as vaccine becomes available to you.”

But the very next thing he said was, “If you are vaccinated, please remember that you still have to be careful and not get involved in crowded situations, particularly where people are not wearing masks.”

Preliminary evidence from last March indicated that vaccinations probably do prevent the spread of COVID-19. The research was compelling enough for the CDC to revise its distancing and safety guidelines for those who aren’t high-risk:

  • Visit with other fully vaccinated people indoors without wearing masks or physical distancing
  • Visit with unvaccinated people from a single household who are at low risk for severe COVID-19 disease indoors without wearing masks or physical distancing
  • Refrain from quarantine and testing following a known exposure if asymptomatic

Even before vaccine doses became widely available to those of us who aren’t high-risk, early-opening states like Texas and Florida did better than clamped-down states like New York and Michigan.

Fauci himself has “no explanation” for why his dystopian prediction for Texas didn’t come true in the weeks after the Lone Star State re-opened.

Nevertheless, Fauci’s guideline is: Get vaccinated but behave as though you’re probably going to get people killed, including yourself.

I’m as pro-vaccination as a person can get. The only reason my wife and I haven’t gotten our shots yet is that there aren’t any available anywhere near us.

But if I were the kind of dupe who still takes Fauci seriously, my response to his advice about getting vaccinated would be “WHY???”

You get your kids vaccinated so they can go play with other kids without getting sick or spreading sickness. If you’re a grownup, you get a shingles vaccine because shingles really hurt. And so on.

In COVID-19 we have a highly infectious respiratory ailment. The vulnerable are almost entirely vaccinated. In Fauci’s example, you’re vaccinated. The purpose of the vaccine is to avoid getting sick, protect the vulnerable, and reduce spreading.

The inducement to getting vaccinated is getting back to normal life.

In Fauci’s view, the inducement is: “You’ll do it because I told you to, and there’s no inducement.”

“No,” many people would rationally conclude, “I’m not doing anything just because you told me to.”

Whatever his actual beliefs, Fauci is working very hard at being the most effective anti-vaxxer ever.