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An Open Letter

Dear GOP Voters,

Looking at the latest Gallup numbers, you could nominate an expired package of processed luncheon meats, and it would sweep the floor with President Obama. In fact, I'd wager that Mr. Bad Bologna would win every state except for Denial -- a 56-state sweep.

So when the straw polls or caucus or primary vote comes your way, vote your conscience, not just for whomever you think is most electable...It'll make you feel better the next morning, I promise.

Besides, strategic voting like that is how John Kerry got the nod back in 2004. And he makes the spoiled bologna smell pretty good.