Happy Canada Day, you wacky Canadian kids.
Let’s celebrate first with an old joke, then with a new offer.
I’m paraphrasing, but I read this back in the ’80s. Don’t know who wrote it, but it might’ve been George Will:
Canada was supposed to have the best of all worlds. An American economy, an English political system, and French culture. Instead they ended up with an English economy, a French political system, and American culture.
Almost makes you wish you’d gotten your asses kicked in 1814, doesn’t it?
Which brings me to my most generous offer, which I can probably work through the Pentagon and the State Department, just as soon as I have some contacts and influence, fearsome personal power and such. In exchange for B.C., Alberta, Saskatchewan, and Manitoba, we’ll take care of your little French problem for you.