Yesterday afternoon, I got a call out of the blue from Jack Glasure, my original PR mentor: Nick Schuyler, the very last client we ever landed together, is finally having his big Hollywood moment.
It was great catching up with Jack. Love the man. Hadn’t spoken in years.
Jack’s the kind of guy who could be airdropped into a crowded business convention — and he’d walk out with everyone’s business card. By a Pritzker-sized margin, he’s the greatest natural-born networker I’ve ever seen.
He also taught me the power of ideas.
It goes like this: To sign a new client, it’s not enough to sell your PR services, because lots of people can do PR. Instead, you’ve gotta do two other things:
- Come up with a clever, original idea that the client can’t resist.
- Explain why no one else on Earth can execute this idea as well as you.
The first part is easy: If you understand PR, there’s NEVER a shortage of creative ideas. They come to you 24/7.
But the second part is a killer.
Even with NDAs and non-circumvent agreements, there’s very little you can legally do to prevent a would-be client from simply stealing your idea and doing it on their own. (Or hiring someone else who’ll do it cheaper.)
Some PR firms try to protect themselves by offering half of an idea — a portion of their plan — and not the whole enchilada. But I’ve seen clients steal half an idea, too.
You can usually tell when that happens, because half-baked PR ideas are pretty obvious: They’re like a three-legged donkey.
Clearly, something is missing.
Which, in the long run, will ruin a brand: You don’t want to become synonymous with unfulfilled promises, disjointed messages, or half-baked ideas.
And this brings us to Washington, D.C.
It’s not exactly the same: In D.C., the root cause isn’t a cat-and-mouse game between PR pitchmen and brand managers, but a system that incentivizes half-baked ideas and incomplete plans. Ideas are floated, half-implemented, and then ignored — or the bureaucratic tar-pit sticks ‘em in place.
One government agency elevates; the next one pulls down.
D.C. is where good ideas go to die — and where half-baked ideas linger on like zombies. They’re the ultimate swamp creatures, affixing themselves to the Deep State membrane, lumbering on (and on) for all eternity.
Unfortunately, half of a good idea is almost always a very BAD idea.
Take, for instance, the 70,000+ Afghan refugees that President Biden imported into the U.S. after our disastrous withdrawal from Kabul. It’s half a good idea.
We’re not heartless: If a brave Afghan was risking life and limb, protecting our soldiers from the Taliban for decades at a time, and he’s earned the trust of our troops, sure, offer him asylum in America.
Especially if the Taliban will murder him if we don’t.
We shouldn’t abandon our allies because that’s not the American way. Not only is it immoral, but it’s against our self-interest since it would likely expose our sons and daughters to a higher death toll in the next war.
But either way, Afghanistan is not like America. The values, culture, and social norms are vastly different. (And if you don’t believe me, ask the U.S. soldiers who were there.)
For that reason alone, the Biden administration owed the American people a thorough — and exhaustive — vetting of each and every Afghan applicant.
Furthermore, we’re not just talking about cultural differences: These refugees were also exposed to unspeakable monstrosities. They witnessed horrors that’ll haunt their souls ‘til the day they die; death, rape, and destruction on an unfathomable scale.
Of course, they have PTSD! How could they not?
Which is why it was 100% foreseeable that an Afghan refugee would grab a gun, have a psychotic break, be susceptible to radicalization, and commit a terrorist act against Americans. It was as predictable as tomorrow’s sunrise.
Nobody should be surprised.
Offering asylum to a limited number of thoroughly vetted Afghans with a proven track record of protecting our soldiers by being the “tip of our spear” against the Taliban — while also monitoring them and ensuring they have access to mental health professionals — is a good idea.
“Only the dead have seen the end of war.” When the next war comes, we’ll want the locals to be incentivized to help our troops.
But importing 70,000 Afghan refugees into the U.S. heartland and then washing our hands of them? And just assuming they’d all be fine?
That’s half a good idea.
And half a good idea is a HORRIBLE idea!
The epidemic of half-baked ideas has now landed at our airports, where Transportation Secretary Sean Duffy seems to be spitballing new ideas every other day.
First was his recommendation to “dress up” when we go to the airport. Okay, fine.
Nothing wrong with that.
(Of course, since it came from the Trump administration, some passengers were gonna protest out of principle. That’s their business: If they wanna look stupid, that’s on them.)
No. A thousand times: NO!
Overlooking the problem of working out when we “dress up,” have you ever smelled the body odor that’s ALREADY at the airport?
If you thought it smelled bad before, guess what it’ll smell like after all the Karens, Chads, and Kevins squeeze in a CrossFit workout after every flight delay. That’ll be a fun flight.
(Those third-world trips will be a doozy. Better pack a nose-pin.)
You’ll experience the sort of odor that could instantly end a prison riot.
And obviously, the public doesn’t want healthy options at the airport. If it were profitable to sell healthy food, someone would’ve done it.
I don’t want healthy food either: If I die in a fiery plane crash, I’ll be damned if the last meal I eat is a plate of broccoli.
Give me nachos or give me death!
Y’know what would be a really good idea, Secretary Duffy: Making flights leave and arrive on time.
So why don’t we focus on that?
Too many half-baked ideas. Not enough good ones.
One Last Thing: The Democrats are on the ropes, but make no mistake: The Dems are still dangerous. We need your help to succeed!
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